Revelation Within On the Go!

Mind Renewal In Our Lives: Part 2

Heidi Bylsma-Epperson and Christina Motley Season 1 Episode 91

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In part 2 of our Mind Renewal discussion, we share our journeys of resilience amidst health challenges, navigating the complexities of mind renewal and faith. Discover how shifting our mindsets became our beacon of hope in reclaiming health and peace. Our conversation explores the transformative power of aligning thoughts with divine truth, even in life's storms.

Experience heartfelt reflections and wisdom as we navigate identity crises, chronic illness, and life's challenges. Hear personal stories, and how such events shape our understanding of fear and comfort. Through scriptural truths and authentic peace, we invite you to view your struggles with grace and fortitude, grounded in God's presence.

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Speaker 1:

Hi and welcome to our podcast Revelation Within On the Go. I'm Heidi Biles-Mapperson, one of your hosts and the owner and lead coach of the.

Speaker 2:

RevelationWithinorg ministry and I'm Christina Motley, your other host, also a Revelation Within coach and Heidi's partner in all things Revelation Within. We're so happy to invite you to join us for this episode of Revelation Within.

Speaker 1:

On the go. We think we're funny, we do.

Speaker 2:

Well, it's special for us right now because we are together.

Speaker 1:

In person together In person in California. Yay.

Speaker 2:

And that's super special for us, super special.

Speaker 1:

It's been a long time Way too long so we're taking this opportunity to bring you part two of Mind Renewal in Our Lives. Sounds like a soap opera. It does. Last week we shared part one of course that makes sense, right and we shared little vignettes of how Mind Renewal kind of came to be in our own lives, ways we've used Mind Renewal and we're going to kind of pick up where we left off. And since we ended with me last week, we're going to start with Christina telling us how do you use Mind Renewal in your life, or how did it come about next, what happened next? Yeah, okay.

Speaker 2:

Well, mine are not in any particular order, I think they kind of bounce around. Yours are more in a timeline, but I'm I'm going to go ahead and share how mind renewal has impacted me, with illness and pain. That sounds like just an awful topic, it does. The thing is, I know so many people that are dealing with illness and pain.

Speaker 2:

Probably pain more than anything and it's worth talking about you know, because we struggle, we struggle so much and as we get older, it becomes more and more of an issue for most people, right, I wouldn't know? Well, so I don't know. I think I've shared this before in the podcast, but when I was younger and before I was diagnosed with Lyme disease, I was very much I don't know. I think I felt invincible. Oh, I did, you did I?

Speaker 1:

did. People even commented on it. I had horses and I was getting on horses that I shouldn't have been getting on and doing crazy things. And somebody said you have a false sense of bravado. There is nothing about this that you should be brave about anyway. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

It's like that. It is like that. I just felt like there was nothing that I couldn't do. I totally depended on my body Depended on being strong, depended on healing. If I was sick with a cold or the flu bug, I just didn't even have any understanding of what it might be like to have an ongoing illness or deal with pain ongoing or anything like that. Really, I just I just was very kind of casual you took your body for granted, took my body for granted, took my health for granted.

Speaker 1:

I did too. I did.

Speaker 2:

I really did, and maybe most of us do, until something hits. But, wow, that has been an area where God has grown me so much and I mean grown yeah really.

Speaker 2:

You know that kind of thing where it's like, well Lord, what are you going to use this for? And you're almost afraid to ask. So when I first got sick with this Lyme disease thing, I mean I was spinning all the plates, I was juggling all the balls. My mother-in-law had just recently passed away and she had been living with us and in hospice care and I was running around and arranging her care and talking with all the caregivers, the nurses and everybody that was coming in and out. And then our parents were across town. My parents and we were very involved with their lives and they were with ours and I had three kids at home and they were school age and we were very busy with them and all their activities and plays and all the birthday parties and you know all those things.

Speaker 2:

And then I worked, I was teaching at the school down the street and, wow, I was spinning all the plates, as I said, and I thought that was what it was all about and I I really put a lot of value. Now I can see I put a lot of value and worth thinking about my own worth in how many plates that I could spin at once and how fast they were spinning and what kind of plates they were and what they had on them. Yes, I mean, really it's true when I think back. You know, I kind of took pride in that, of course. Oh, I'm so tired, I've only done 25 things today.

Speaker 2:

I'm amazing, yeah, and that was kind of where I was at for a long time, and so all of a sudden I was knocked flat and Heidi and I, thankfully, were prayer partners already.

Speaker 2:

She prayed me through every single day and continued to yes, and it was very, very scary because my body was not bouncing back and at first I thought I'm going to be fine, I'm going to kick this, my body's going to get rid of it. We're going to figure out what it is. Well, it took 14 months of seeing specialists that looked at me like I have no idea, until we figured out what it was. I had never in my life had anything like that, where I had to deal with something unknown and very uncomfortable, and I mean no end in sight, can I?

Speaker 1:

just insert something here, in case you, listener have a mysterious illness that moves where it's affecting you in your body, like goes from your neck to your knee joint to your heart. Have them check you for the Lyme disease infections, because there's three co-infections they can't test for right.

Speaker 2:

Well, I have three, but there's many, many more Many that I've never had.

Speaker 1:

Because this was crazy. It was like a moving target. So she had all these different symptoms and this was crazy. It was like a moving target, so she had all these different symptoms and it was crazy. Nobody could figure it out because they'd never heard of that and and a traditionally trained doctor might miss it. So you got to go to somebody who specializes, so well, in case there's anybody who's wondering.

Speaker 2:

No, I think it's worth saying I don't even live in a state where Lyme disease is very common at all. It's very uncommon in Colorado, yeah, but I actually was bit by the tick in Southern California, which is also an uncommon place.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, and I lay dormant for a bazillion years.

Speaker 2:

But anyway, it's really a weird story. So what's this got to do with mind renewal? Yeah, so, thankfully, thank God, thank God, thank God. I had already learned how to renew my mind, and the mind renewal that I used for my food and eating issues had already started spilling over into all the areas of my life and I am so grateful, I know, looking back, that God prepared me. Not that I was ready, I mean, I didn't feel ready for any of it and I was scared silly. But God knew that without that mind renewal I would struggle at a whole different level.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, In fact you talked about impossible days. In the last podcast we did about this, and I know for a fact that those impossible days there were many of them once you got Lyme disease.

Speaker 2:

Oh well, for a while every day was impossible, and then I got to the point where I could manage some of it and I had found a specialist, but still, well, basically, the plates, they all fell at once. You can imagine the spinning plates and how I'm. I'm like skipping around, la, la, la la, spinning all these plates and, you know, thinking I was doing an amazing job. And then they all had to fall and they all broke. I mean, I was, uh, still being a mom. I was a mom laying on the couch in tears, you know it was. I had used all my sick days at work.

Speaker 2:

There was, you know, the money was going and all the tests, and the biggest thing that I was confronted with at that time, I think right, right out of the gate, was who are you? Where do you get your value from? You know your plates have fallen. All the balls you were juggling are bouncing down the street. You can't even see them anymore. So you know, where do you get your value from?

Speaker 2:

Well, I thought it was from working really hard, and you know doing this many things in a day and having a house that was this clean, or you know all these different things. You know, taking the kids here and there. But I was confronted with what does God say about this? Am I worth anything anymore? Do I have any value if I'm laying on the couch sick and downhearted? You know, it's like renewing my mind about my worth and value. That brought me to my identity in Christ and that's not something I ever really thought about before. I really hadn't needed to, but now I really needed to.

Speaker 2:

It didn't happen right away. It was definitely a process. It happened over time. But when I went to the word and looked at what does God say about our worth and value over time, I realized, you know what. It's not dependent on performance, right. It's not dependent on what I look like on any given day, or what I can do, or how professional I am or what degree I have, or you know just any of those things. Or you know what kind of a mom I was, what kind of a wife, how many things I was involved in at church, right.

Speaker 2:

All of a sudden I realized that's not where my value comes from and that was such a relief, I bet. You know, heidi, it didn't come easily and it was a process and I'm still in process with that. But, wow. God really needed to show me that. I needed to see it. That was a huge blind spot for me, and, of course, what was involved too are other people. How do I respond to other people if I believe that performance is where we get our value? It made a huge difference in my relationships and really, really a huge difference in my relationship with Christ, and we have these amazing resources that we've had for years at Revelation. Within who Am I in Christ lists, we have several different ones, and these are lists that I use frequently that are all based on scripture. They have scripture references and it's just truth after truth after truth about who I am in Christ.

Speaker 1:

If you want that resource, you can get it. I'm going to give you a website URL right now H-T-T-P-S colon forward slash forward slash teamlifeisgoodcom. Forward slash identity teamlifeisgoodcom forward slash identity and you will find the PDF there. Thank you, thank you, heidi?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so renewing my mind. It was so incredibly important when all of that began and continues to be, and I'm much better than I used to be. But I still go through some pretty, pretty severe ups and downs depending on what medicines I'm on for the co-infections that I have. I'm still in that season 10 years later, but, wow, what a difference it made to think God's thoughts after him so intentionally during that time and up until now. Yeah, how about you Heidi?

Speaker 1:

Your turn, thinking God's thoughts after him. You know there are so many ways that, if left to my own devices, my thoughts aren't anywhere close to being like his, and that's where I get into all kinds of trouble. That's where I get an attitude, I get grumpy, I might even get sinful because I might turn to counterfeit comforts I might use a sharp word. Anyway, what I really want to do is bring my thoughts into alignment with God about whatever he allows in my life, because as a loving, sovereign, good, kind God, he allows things into my life Like he allowed Lyme disease to come into your life. I mean, yes, there's free will and, yes, there is sovereignty of God. I don't get how they both work together. So in my life he also decided to allow sickness to come in.

Speaker 2:

Yes, at a very strange time.

Speaker 1:

I was training for an amazing bucket list trip to Peru to go hiking and backpacking in Machu Picchu. I was so excited about this trip and one of my ways of preparing for it was to go to Colorado for a week long trip where.

Speaker 1:

I hiked at high elevation and at varying distances to see if I was in fact ready. And I was ready, I was ready. It was an amazing and, yes, I met Christina in person and a couple of my other Colorado clients. It was so much fun. It was the end of April, about 10 years ago, and I got home and I remember having some incredible pain and I had just gone on another hike so scary and I had used hiking poles and I was convinced it was the hiking poles that were the problem.

Speaker 1:

I'd been told I needed hiking poles for Machu Picchu, so I was going to learn how to use them and it was terrifying.

Speaker 1:

It was terrifying, I felt such agony when I would breathe, and I remember thinking there is something seriously wrong with my lungs. Something is wrong with my lungs. I'm not going to be able to go to Machu Picchu. Better get this figured out before I get to Peru. Anyway, god allowed. Oh, it must have been in there for a while. It was a staph infection that was living in my spine that, yeah, I clearly wasn't going to go to Machu Picchu. That trip for me was canceled and I began to basically whittle away. My whole body began to kind of. I lost muscle mass, I lost what fat I had left because I had been working on really getting fit and I was terribly sick. And it was June of that year, 2014. And they still hadn't figured out what was wrong. I had to practice thinking God's thoughts all the time and I was so scared what is happening to me? I couldn't digest properly, so I didn't want to eat. Anyway.

Speaker 1:

Oh my gosh, it was so scary, it was scary, so scary, and Christine and I recruited right away at that time to be my prayer partner, and she was put to work immediately.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, but you didn't know what was to come.

Speaker 1:

No, I didn't. Neither did you, I guess. But anyway, I had to think God's thoughts about this when I went into the hospital. I went into the ER because some things were really wrong and I was told by the ER doc. This poor man told me I think you have cancer. We found lesions in our radiograph of your spine. We think there's something going on there. We're going to admit you to the cancer ward.

Speaker 1:

I'm thankful I did not have cancer, but it ended up being a staph infection in my spine, as I mentioned, and I had lost the use of my legs. I'm kind of compressing the timeline a little bit here, but I just remember how God said you have been training for this, not Machu Picchu. You have been training for this big event, this bucket list trip. You've been training for learning how to think right in the most difficult of challenges, how to think my thoughts after me about unexpected trials that could kill you, because that's where I was, I could lose my life to the staph infection. I mean, really it was terrifying. It was terrifying. What was the reason my legs stopped working? What was the prognosis? What was I going to have to do next? Would I always be in a wheelchair. I mean, I just remember all of those thoughts going through my head and I remember waiting outside the operating room in preparation for the anesthesiologist coming and doing what anesthesiologists do, and God just laid on my heart, think my thoughts and I remember what came to mind was the mind controlled by the spirit is life and peace, which is in Romans 8, I think, verse 5. The mind controlled by the spirit is life and peace. The mind controlled by the flesh is death. It's going to lead to death, and I thought about that and I just kept thinking on. Lord, thank you that I can think your thoughts, because the mind that is controlled by the spirit is life and it is peace. Peace doesn't come from having a clean bill of health. If my thoughts aren't aligned with God's, I may not have peace. I don't think I will.

Speaker 1:

And so I went into that surgery having renewed my mind right out there in the hallway, I remember, and I was at peace and I woke up with that. It was amazing. I woke up with that verse going through my head and I just remember that what God gave me to do during the time that I started off in the hospital there I mean the first week was a job to pray for others. It was totally not, heidi, it was. I want you to use the still time to pray for anybody and everybody that you possibly can. And at the time I had an amazing Facebook community and began to ask others how I could be praying for them, even as I was sharing. Please pray for me. In my memory, it's one of the sweetest times I can recall being in the hospital at that time, even though I would not want to do it again, not for a million years I just felt intimacy with God as I brought my thoughts into alignment with his, as I tried desperately to think his thoughts about this.

Speaker 1:

Okay, my worth, my value, is not defined by my ability to climb mountains in a single bound. It's not even dependent upon my ability to walk. And I was an athlete. I had played competitive tennis for years and had really enjoyed doing that and appreciated the accolades for doing that, and on and on, and that was all going to be gone. It seemed like I might not ever play tennis again or hike again.

Speaker 1:

Or I remember when the physical therapist came in to talk to me after the surgery and they were going to put me in their rehabilitation program and asked me what is a goal that you have? And I remember you mean after walking again. Yes, I said I want to hike again and it was a goal because it seems so out of reach. It seems so out of reach but God had just laid on my heart that just keep thinking my thoughts about this. I have allowed you to be in this place and it is for my purposes and I just knew that. I knew that. I knew that. I knew that I could still live what God had planned and purposed for me in this world, even in this situation, if he allowed me never to get the use of my legs back again.

Speaker 1:

And I have gotten the use of my legs back again, not my athletic ability but the use of my legs, and I'm grateful for that. But it reminds me of what he's been teaching me a lot since the beginning of the year that I want to be ready and there is no way that the condition that he allows me to be in like in that case, with a strange staph infection in my spine, there was no way that could get in the way of doing God's will, what he planned in advance for me to do, those good works that Ephesians 2.10 says. There is nothing that he will allow in my life that could get in the way of me being ready to do what he's called me to do. I want to be the best me I can be, with whatever health I have, with whatever knowledge I have, and renew my mind to be in alignment with his thoughts so that I can be ready to do those good works which he's prepared in advance for me to do. That's way different than how I would have handled that whole thing.

Speaker 2:

Yes, Wow it is. It's such an incredible story. Okay, so the next one that I'll share of how I've used mind renewal in my life are those moments that I call SOS. Those are the moments when something happens that you never would have expected, that you know you were not really prepared for. It's just one of those things that happens in life, some kind of an event that really throws you off guard. They're usually scary.

Speaker 2:

So I'm going to share an example my daughter Catherine. She's in college, she's doing great, she's brilliant and beautiful, but when she was a teenager and a new driver, she had a lot of trouble with driving. You know, she had some vision issues, but I don't know if it was kind of a spatial awareness thing or I don't know, immaturity, different things but she had trouble. And there were three different times, with three different vehicles that we owned, that I would get these SOS calls, and it all happened within six months or so. So I will never forget these. I will never forget.

Speaker 2:

I would answer the phone and there was my beautiful daughter sobbing on the other end, hardly able to speak, hardly able to breathe, trying to tell me that she had been involved in a car accident. Trying to tell me that she had been involved in a car accident, and then I spent the next few minutes trying to figure out is she okay, you know, is the other person okay, and where are you and what's going on? And it was so hard to even understand her because she was just sobbing and sobbing and sobbing and it was so scary, was just sobbing and sobbing and sobbing and it was so scary. And I have to say, I have to admit that when I was 16, 17 years old, I had the same experience. Oh, really Well, I was in some car accidents. I lived in LA at the time. They were not all my fault, some of them were. So I was even, you know, more kind of emotionally on edge about car accidents, I guess.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

It bungeed me, it brought me right back to when I was in that situation anyway. But that's what I mean by an SOS moment. You get a phone call, or you know that letter comes in the mail, or you see something, or you're part of something. It happens you know, kind of very quickly, you're caught off guard. It's like whoa, I can't handle this. This is impossible. I don't know what to do, and it's difficult, very, very difficult. So this is one of my favorite ways to use mind renewal. So we have shared this with the people that we've worked with, because everybody has these.

Speaker 2:

I'm so sorry, but it's true. We all have these things hit us. Hopefully not that often, but once in a while it's an SOS. And so the first thing that I do in that moment after I know that everyone's okay and in this case, with Catherine and her car accident, I would get in the car and start doing this because I had to go to her. The first thing I would do is okay, who are you? God? You're the same, you are steadfast, you are strong, you are faithful, you are with me, you are with Kat, you are the God of the universe. You have all of this in your hands.

Speaker 2:

So the first thing I do is focus on him. That's perfect. And it can take 15 seconds. Yeah, it can be so quick. Do you need a journal? No, I know. Are you kidding me? I'm flying down the street in a car. Yeah, good thing I didn't have my own car accident, but no, anyway.

Speaker 2:

And then the next thing that I do is focus on who I am in Christ, which we just talked about, how I had to learn that, and I'm so grateful. So then the next thing is okay, I'm God's girl, kat is God's girl. We're okay. You know, our identity is secure, who we are in Christ has not changed. So those two things are the same. God is the same, and our identity and that we belong to him and are covered and protected by him, that's all the same.

Speaker 2:

And then I say to myself again and again everything that's important is still in place. Everything that's important is still in place. So, whether it's on the phone or in the car, or at the hospital, or like I remember one time, my dad called me and said your mom grabbed my hand in the kitchen and we're both on the floor and he had fallen on top of her. Again, that's an SOS call. They were in their 80s. That was just one of many SOSs with them. But in those moments I can renew my mind what a gift. And I can focus on the Lord first and that just brings so much peace in the moment and then focus on you know, me and whoever's involved. And then everything that's important is still in place. The rest will somehow get taken care of. But these things are for sure and if I need to, I can say them again and again God, you are faithful. God, you are faithful. I am yours, I am your beloved God, you are stronger than this. You saw it coming. You are with me. It didn't surprise you.

Speaker 2:

It didn't surprise you. God is there, he was prepared, he's ready and he's already at work. I mean, wow, that makes all the difference, all the difference in the world in those SOS moments.

Speaker 1:

And you know, one of the things that occurred to me as you're talking about those moments is they all seem to have one thing in common that the alternative to turning to God would be fear. What's going to happen? What's going on? Is she okay? Is she going to stay okay? Is she going to ever be able to drive again, or whatever it might be? And I once heard somebody say that fear is rooted in imagining a future without God in it. That's pretty powerful to me.

Speaker 2:

If.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to imagine a future at all, if I'm going to allow my imagination to run wild, those lofty speculations that the King James Bible mentions in 2 Corinthians 10. I want it to be with God in that future, with me and when I know he's there. Perfect love does cast out fear. His love is perfect and it does cast out fear, and reminding myself of those truths, thinking his thoughts about my fear, can really help a lot too.

Speaker 2:

And there's another way that often we'll go without renewing our minds, and that is to a counterfeit comfort. Yeah, absolutely so. I don't mean like in the moment that I wouldn't go to Catherine and help her at the scene of the car accident, but what about on the way home? What about when I get home? And I've shared many times that the stronghold I've struggled with for so many years is food and eating, and so how does that play in? I would need to be calmed down somehow, I would need to find peace somehow. Not that that would work, but I would go to a counterfeit comfort. When you're renewing your mind, you're already filled up, you are satisfied with the truth. That satisfies like nothing else and God's comfort and God's presence and his peace.

Speaker 1:

So it's kind of like when you get to the end of your day, or an hour later after you've gotten the news or whatever it might be, you go oh my gosh, that was so hard, I have had such an impossible day, I deserve a what, or I need to comfort myself. I mean, you might not even think that, but that is where those thoughts will take us, and what we want to do in those moments is return again to who is God, who am I and everything that's important is still in place, and allow our souls to be filled up on his truth, his thoughts, and think those thoughts. And for me, another really helpful thing in those moments is gratitude.

Speaker 2:

Yes, yes, yes.

Speaker 1:

And here's the thing gratitude. Science has been showing that gratitude leads to dopamine hits, and so very often the reason we gravitate towards whatever your counterfeit comfort is but food for many of us who listen to this podcast is because there's something rewarding in turning to food. I don't believe that the food is addictive. I believe the dopamine. Oh, absolutely. And so it's the dopamine. And so I turn to food to get that dopamine hit. It brings comfort, it brings a sense of pleasure. What if I could get that same sense by God. Thank you that cat is safe, thank you that the other driver is safe, thank you that we're up to date on our insurance and it'll all be covered, or whatever it might be Like when Christina and I you know we've been together since Wednesday and now it's Friday when we got to the house and Michael was home, he shared with me he'd gotten news about his latest MRI and the prostate cancer and it wasn't as good news as he hoped.

Speaker 1:

That was an SOS moment for me. I mean I could in that moment, or later hours later we could get to the condo and I could just start gravitating towards that dopamine hit. I need a dopamine hit. I need that comfort, that sense of wellbeing that dopamine gives me and in an ideal world, I would turn to gratitude instead. Thank you, god, that we have excellent physicians that are on this. We have the understanding that the first MRI wasn't accurate. We know that there's a plan, there's three different possibilities for Michael's treatment, et cetera, et cetera, and I can give gratitude, for I could give gratitude that it's not raining today and it may not have anything to do with the prostate cancer or not prostate cancer, and it could still give me that dopamine hit. I don't need to have it be about the trial, it can be about anything, but I will experience the blessing that God has planted our bodies to be able to give us of that dopamine hit, which you know it's a neurotransmitter that makes us feel good, so let's use it.

Speaker 2:

And then we don't need sugar to do that. Well, and to be honest, I mean gratitude. Yes, Gratitude is mind renewal, for sure, but all of our tools I feel so much better when I use them.

Speaker 1:

Me too.

Speaker 2:

The tools. They connect us with the Lord. They bring peace, they bring calm. Just, you know, even thinking about breath, prayers, breathing in deeply, saying a truth or God's, you know, scripture, and it's like wow, these tools, they really, really help in those moments.

Speaker 1:

Other ways that I've used mind renewal in my life have to do with when somebody says something to me and it hurts my feelings. Yes, I've had to remind myself what are God's thoughts about that? Very simply, Lord, tell me what your thoughts are and then speak those truths to my own soul. How about you? Oh, how about?

Speaker 2:

parenting, oh yeah, oh, my goodness gracious. Yes, parenting, renewing my mind about being a mom, about my kids, renewing my mind about being a mom about my kids, about their behaviors, about God's role in their lives, all of those things is huge. It is life-changing. As a parent, to use mind renewal.

Speaker 1:

And after you have seen your chicks leave the nest and that's the season that I'm in my kids have gone, feeling regret what if I did this differently? Or did I cause this, or I wish I had done that? I want to think God's thoughts about that too. So that's yet another area of life where I have used mind renewal to remind myself that even God's own kids in the Garden of Eden, they chose to go their own way and do their own thing. Right, adam and Eve. He was the perfect parent, reminding myself of what is true that even God had kids that rebelled, you know, and that's helpful for me, and it still is. What are some other things like when there's more month than money?

Speaker 2:

Yes, for sure. Yeah, I was just going to say my marriage. How different do I approach my relationship with my husband when I'm already filled up with truth and peace, and what are God's thoughts about all the things happening in my life? I can approach him, then, with grace, with gratitude, with generosity, because I'm already filled up, I already know my identity in Christ, I already know who God is, I've already practiced gratitude Boy, that changes a marriage, yeah that changes it definitely does?

Speaker 2:

How about life transitions, you know, yeah, that's a really good time to renew your mind, yeah. We're so glad that you've been with us today.

Speaker 1:

Thanks for joining us.

Speaker 2:

Thanks for joining us and we hope to see you at our next episode of Revelation Within.

Speaker 1:

On the go. Bye, see you next time. Bye for now.

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