Speaker 1: 0:02

Hi and welcome to our podcast Revelation Within On the Go. I'm Heidi Bilesma-Epperson, one of your hosts and the owner and lead coach of the RevelationWithinorg ministry.

Speaker 2: 0:13

And I'm Christina Motley, your other host, also a Revelation Within coach and Heidi's partner in all things Revelation Within, and we are so happy to invite you to join us for this episode of Revelation Within On the go.

Speaker 1: 0:37

The crowd goes wild.

Speaker 2: 0:40

Just so you know, we both had our arms wide up in the air.

Speaker 1: 0:43

That's such a fun beginning for a podcast on a topic that, Just so you know, we both had our arms wide up in the air. That's such a fun beginning for a podcast on a topic that well. Let's give examples of what this podcast topic is instead of titling it Okay, All right, so I can't believe I did that. I am just an idiot.

Speaker 2: 1:00

Hmm, I am so uncomfortable in this body of mine.

Speaker 1: 1:08

I'm looking in the mirror and I say to myself no, I don't, I don't accept this.

Speaker 2: 1:15

I will never move forward in this area of my life.

Speaker 1: 1:20

I will never be free.

Speaker 2: 1:23

I can't believe that I keep messing up again and again, and again.

Speaker 1: 1:28

Well, I imagine the listener gets the gist. Oh yeah, so we're talking a little bit today about our self-talk, the stuff that we say to ourselves again and again, and again and again. How much self-talk do we do? Yeah, all day long, and sometimes all through the night, when those of us who are awake during the night, many people who we talk to struggle with sleeping soundly, and that is a time in our darkest hour. You know, here's my theory, and I don't have a proof text in scripture for it. So do with it what you will Be a Berean or whatever.

Speaker 1: 2:12

I think the enemy and his buddies, his minions, the demons, like to whisper in our ears. They can't put thoughts in our heads, they can't read what's in our heads, read our minds. But I think they watch us all our lives long and they know our weaknesses and then they whisper in our ears and I mean don't you think? Isn't that a plausible explanation?

Speaker 2: 2:37

Yeah, I think definitely. But it's not just the enemy, it's me and it's the world too. The messages that we hear from the world oh, you're not enough, you don't look this way, you don't act this way, you don't make enough money, you don't do this well, the world is all about performance, and so it makes sense to me that we would be talking to ourselves often about how we don't measure up. And boy, that's a hard way to live.

Speaker 1: 3:09

Well, and then another source of these thoughts that we speak to ourselves is from our past experience, and in our coaching groups, in our community, we refer to these as little t truths, sometimes because they are situations and examples that really did happen. So I can't say they're lies. I mean some thoughts that I think are lies, but some of them I experienced. I experienced like, for instance, I lost a hundred pounds once upon a time pardon me for mentioning a number like that and then I gain it back. And what if that's happened to me over time? A whole lot, maybe my whole life.

Speaker 1: 3:54

I will never be able to keep the weight off, is the thought that I might say, and that's defeating right out of the starting gate, or I will never be able to be healthy, or I will never be able to relate to food in a peaceful way. And sometimes these things are rooted from my experience, but they don't have the right to define me now or going forward. I get to choose. Like Christina, you often say well, we both do. We often say I get to choose. Like Christina, you often say well, we both do. We often say I get to choose what I will think Right.

Speaker 2: 4:27

I get to choose. Well, and that's kind of mind blowing. It kind of goes along with the choosing your thoughts. It's mind blowing. I don't think I believed that for a really long time that you could choose yeah. I think, I just thought well, this is just the way it is. This is who I am. This is the way it is. This is the way I think. And then what about? There were other things for me, such as. This is how it's always been in my family.

Speaker 1: 4:56

This is how.

Speaker 2: 4:57

I was raised. This is what I saw growing up. These are the experiences. This is just who I am. And I think that I, for a long time I thought you know what? This is just my lot in life. These are the cards I've been dealt, whatever you want to say, but the truth is in Christ we are free.

Speaker 1: 5:18

Yes, yes, god has a lot to say about this. But there's another reason why I might be caught into this self-talk that is really kind of destructive and negative and it's because I don't want to put pressure on myself. It's almost like my survival brain kicks in with. That's going to be hard to change. Everything is too hard. We need to. You know, use these strategies like overeating and overscrolling and overspending to survive. How hard life is. And I mean, we may not think them at a conscious level. Right, our brains kick in with. Okay, we're going to protect Heidi at all costs and we're not going to expect her to do the hard work that it's going to take and the deprivation and the the you know, dying to self that it's going to take to be healthy and whole. It's like wait a minute wait a minute.

Speaker 2: 6:13

Yeah, and I can relate to that and I know so many of our listeners can relate to. Let's just hide away. You know it's like I just want to go to a safe place and have my little things around me and whatever it is, and let's just, you know, because this is too hard and yes, life is really hard a lot of the time it really is. But just that idea of wait a minute, I can be in control of my own thoughts. Yes, what I'm thinking about. And then you've heard us say so many times our thoughts leads to what we believe and our beliefs lead to what we do, the actions, how we make decisions, how we move forward in the day, and so thoughts are incredibly important, incredibly important, and I honestly I important, incredibly important. Yes, and I honestly I didn't know that, I didn't understand that until I was 45. And that's when I learned it. That was 11 years ago.

Speaker 1: 7:18

Yay, and here's the thing. I know, I mean I'm recognizing this is going to sound ridiculous, given that I've been in this ministry for so many years, but it's true, I'm just being honest authentic. I'm disclosing, I'm divulging.

Speaker 2: 7:35

What is it? What is?

Speaker 1: 7:36

it.

Speaker 1: 7:38

I have been in a habit of thinking a certain way that is counter to living my calling and each one of us has a calling from God. It doesn't have to be a ministry, official ministry, but God has called us to this time in this place for his purposes and he attributes value and identity and worth to us. That we might be in the habit of thinking thoughts that go counter to that and I have been stuck there for quite a while and I've been realizing that a little bit over time. But it stops now. It stops now and, and what is cool is I can choose when I wake up in the morning going, oh my gosh, I don't want to do another day.

Speaker 2: 8:28

If that's.

Speaker 1: 8:29

If that's your thought, if that's my thought, okay, what is going on here? What is probably going on is I'm trying to build a wall of safety. I'm not going to venture out into the world where there's risk. I'm not going to try to be all God has called me to be, because what if I mess up? Well, you know what? If I mess up, I can look and learn with him. He is there to give me access to his solutions. He wants to give me everything I need for life and godliness, for his calling, to fulfill his calling. So if I am thinking again and again, day after day, the same thoughts that are kind of holding me back, I want to invite God in, definitely invite God in, and say, okay, god, I want to train myself to think with the mind of Christ. Now. I want to train myself to think your thoughts about whatever I might face, about this difficult relationship I'm in, about the financial situation, I'm in about whatever faces me in any given day. I want to think your thoughts and then practice thinking God's thoughts. It's amazing what can happen. I choose to think God's thoughts and things change Another thing that happens, and we don't often talk about emotions in the context of our little progression.

Speaker 1: 10:30

You know, I choose what I will think, what I think will impact my beliefs and what I believe will impact my actions. But in there, what I think on is going to stir up things in my physiological body that cause emotions to happen. There are going to be emotions that respond to cortisol If I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't believe I have to go to the dentist today and I hate the dentist, and the dentist scares me and he's going to hurt me. You know all of that sort of thing. Right, I'm going to have fear is going to be something. What if I were to capture the thought back when it's just starting and say you know what? I will be looking at this in my rear view mirror two hours from now. It'll be behind me. The other night I'm going to another true confession.

Speaker 2: 11:12

Oh, my God.

Speaker 1: 11:12

Oh, let's go, let's go. The other night I had to attend. I had to, I got to attend. See, there's an example of changing your thinking. On the fly, I got to attend our church's worship team practice. I had been asked this week, can you bring your guitar and sing and do backup vocals? And so, like I don't play the guitar very often, in fact I couldn't even find my guitar.

Speaker 1: 11:42

I hadn't seen it since the retreat a women's retreat in October. Yes, I got to go with you, anyway, and so I began dreading this practice and it's like hold everything, and I did. I actually said what's going on here?

Speaker 2: 12:00

I love that. Hold everything. I love that.

Speaker 1: 12:02

Yeah, it's like wait just hold it on, Hold your horses, Heidi. And I reminded myself how many years did I use my guitar every Sunday when I was singing backup vocals? I did it for years at a previous church and that's been a while, and that's been a while. But this is my wheelhouse, this is my comfort zone. Since when is it a problem for me to go to the worship team practice and why am I freaking out about it? Well, I do think my mind was trying to protect me from you. Know, you got to have your fingers in the right places and you got to have calluses and all that good stuff. Anyway, okay, but I went to that worship team choosing what I would think, and I had a blast. I had a blast. I don't know how it sounded, but I had a blast. Yeah, it was really cool and it was because I chose to think God's thought. I thought with the mind of Christ and he was whispering to my spirit. Wait a minute. I called you to do this years ago and you did it for years.

Speaker 1: 13:08

Yes, and just because you haven't for a while doesn't mean you can't. Now. I'm calling you to do this. Oh, I love that. Isn't that awesome.

Speaker 2: 13:17

I love that. Well, that was life-changing for you, heidi, that time, that day, and it's not going to affect you just that evening. It's going to affect you. Going forward, you'll be able to bring you know, recall that. You'll be able to remember that and thank God for it, and the next time you're feeling that way, you'll be able to renew your mind again the same way, like it's that has actually. That's stop hold everything that has changed your life. It has.

Speaker 1: 13:47

And it's real simple. It's just hold everything. I'm going to take those thoughts captive, right, and I'm going to submit them to obedience to Christ, just like we're told in second Corinthians, wherever it is I think it's chapter 10. And then to recall, with the mind of Christ, what is true, and what is true was it was so interesting how that directly went. Wait a minute, where am I going with this? Anyway, I just I love that, and we can do that moment by moment, situation by situation invite God to tell you, okay, help me to see Lord when I am thinking a thought that is rooted in my past experience, or that is protective, or that is a lie, a downright full on lie, or that will diminish my willingness to live my calling in Christ. Yes, and help me to hold everything. Just stop it.

Speaker 2: 14:42

Just stop it. Yes, yeah, and invite.

Speaker 1: 14:45

God in.

Speaker 2: 14:47

It's amazing. It is life changing. It really is. It is Okay. Well, I'll share one too. So just this week. You know, I live in Colorado Springs. We're not that cold in Colorado Springs compared to other places in the nation, but we can. We can dip into some really cold temperatures.

Speaker 2: 15:06

So we did go below zero this week and I've never really been bothered by it until this week, and the reason was because it was a problem for my work, for my coaching, for my ability to be able to do what I want to do, what I've been called to do, what God said do this, christina. And all of a sudden, you know, my heater broke. And then we got another heater and it broke and it ran out of propane. And then we got another one that was brand new and it didn't work. And there was this anxiety that was building up in me, because some of you know that my office is my front porch and it's enclosed and all the windows are double except the door, but it's not insulated and if the sun is not shining and if the temperatures go below 20 or so, it does get really cold on this porch. I've had the same little space heater for like two years. I don't think twice about it, I turn it on and off and it's fine and I'm able to do what God's called me to do.

Speaker 2: 16:16

But this particular couple of days I realized that I was really being shaken by this. You know this situation because I couldn't get warm and I was trying to do my coaching, I was trying to do my work and I thought, well, I could go in another room of the house, but I don't have all my things there and privacy is so important when you're doing this work, and I thought I can't be private anywhere else in the house. And so I didn't realize any of this at first. I thought why am I feeling so out of sorts? Why am I feeling so anxious today? This doesn't feel like me. Why am I feeling this way? And, heidi, you mentioned earlier that I was feeling vulnerable because I was not able to perform, I wasn't able to do my work when I was that cold. It's just, you know I was, and I had my electric blanket on and I had a big jacket on and my scarf and hat. I mean, it was ridiculous, for all my zoom calls.

Speaker 1: 17:26

Well, you looked adorable in your getup.

Speaker 2: 17:29

Oh, thank you, but the fact that heater after heater after heater failed me, not just one. We had three different heaters fail, and now I have a fourth one that's working right here next to me and making me very warm and cozy. But it could be something so simple as that. It almost sounds ridiculous. It's so simple.

Speaker 2: 17:52

So, for me, when I'm feeling out of sorts, unsettled, something just feels wrong. I'm feeling vulnerable. Just like you said, heidi, I need to just stop. I need to stop because what's going on in my mind? I can't do this. My day is all wrong. What's the matter with me? Why can't I handle something so simple as this? I'm having these thoughts going through my mind, but the truth is, I've got a situation here that's causing me to feel vulnerable and out of sorts, and that's very real. And so then I can renew my mind, even on the fly, like you did, heidi, and I can say you know what? I'm feeling vulnerable because it's too cold in this room, like ice cold, and I'm feeling anxious because God has called me to this job and I'm having trouble doing it. And so that makes sense, doesn't it that?

Speaker 2: 18:53

doesn't mean that there's something wrong with me. It makes sense. It's understandable that I would be anxious. So then what can I tell myself? That is true in the moment. God is with me and he knows this is going on.

Speaker 1: 19:07

Right, it's not a surprise.

Speaker 2: 19:09

No, and you know what? I had some of my best calls on that day. Oh, that's awesome. It was not me, it was not. I was feeling unsettled out of sorts, vulnerable, with this cold in my porch, and God was using me, somehow using the time to get across to these precious, precious ladies, and they were amazing calls and I was like Lord, that was all you.

Speaker 2: 19:37

So that was so cool that he showed that to me, yeah, and just reminded me that it's totally not me, it's totally him, which was a great reminder. But then to renew my mind and say, when this call is over, I can take steps in the direction to get warmer. In some way, I can open the door, I can try this, I can try a different heater, you know, and then eventually we solve the problem with that a new heater. But I can renew my mind and I can have peace. God gives me peace in his thoughts and he used that day to show me it's not about you, christina, it's totally about me. Let me show you. So that was just a really sweet blessing that came out of it.

Speaker 1: 20:25

That's so cool. I love that. You could have gone down that rabbit hole. You could have been swept into that dark maelstrom. And just poor me. What am I going to do? I'm just going to cancel my calls. That would have fed shame, probably. If you're like some of us, if I'm not living my purpose, it's almost like using a screwdriver as a hammer. I'm supposed to be used for a certain purpose and God has ordained that and he gives me joy in it. And when I don't do that purpose, I don't function well and there's shame that comes along with that. So here's the thing I want to be sure we wrap up with. What can we do about this If I'm in a pattern of thinking thoughts that keep me diminished in some way?

Speaker 1: 21:14

that keep me from living the purpose God has called me to, and all ofused a God-inspired and empowered purpose. If I want to live that purpose, there are things I can do to ensure that I am more likely to do that purpose. What are those things? Mind renewal, that's really clear.

Speaker 2: 21:45

Well, and your purpose may not be, like Heidi's, running a ministry, but your purpose may be to, you know, keep the house running.

Speaker 2: 21:54

Your purpose may be. It may be a job or career, but it also may be having to do with, you know, relationships and your family, taking care of kids or or elderly, or loved ones, or whatever. We're all called to different things in different seasons, and not one thing is more important than the other. And so, whatever it is, whether you're called to getting those dishes done or you're called to lead a ministry like Heidi, you know it's all the same thing in God's view. We're working for him, right, working for him and his plans and his purposes.

Speaker 1: 22:30

All right. So I want a strategy, I want a plan. We say mind renewal is going to fix this, but if I'm going to truly train my brain to think thoughts that are going to enable me to live my purpose, I think that I want to be proactive, preemptive. I want to think with the mind of Christ and practice thinking with the mind of Christ, even before the day starts, even before that meeting, even before the nighttime temptations come. I want to think God's thoughts about all of it, all along the way. It doesn't mean I have to sit down for a one hour long quiet time, though that's lovely. If I can, yes, but I do this on the fly. It's like anticipating, okay. Or even if it hits me before I put my feet on the floor in the morning, what are thoughts that are going to serve God's purposes for me? What are thoughts I can choose to think right now that will enable me to answer the call on my life?

Speaker 1: 23:36

with the strength God gives me. And how can I do that? For sure, for me is, who am I in Christ? Because even as a young mom, a homeschooling mom, two kids, I would struggle with living my purpose, which was to minister to my family, both in terms of their education, but also in terms of just loving them well, and so very often I would start the day defeated. I didn't know how to renew my mind in the way that we teach now. And so how can this work for that?

Speaker 2: 24:09

Yeah, I think that's true for so many of us in our, in our situations, our jobs, careers, whatever we're called to. So let's go to the source. Let's go to what we know for sure, and that is who we are in Christ. So, when you were homeschooling and you had a really good day, or you had a really bad day, or you had a really good morning and you had a really bad afternoon, or whatever it was, all of that is not your identity. All of that is the circumstances of the day and what God's called you to. Yes, but your identity, my identity, remains the same in Christ, and so that's one of the best ways to renew our minds is to remember wait a minute, wait a minute, stop everything, hold everything, hold everything. I am a girl of God, I am redeemed, I'm God's daughter. I am redeemed, I'm God's daughter. Everything that's important is still in place. You know, god is still God and I am still his girl.

Speaker 2: 25:14

No matter what's happening on this crazy earth at this moment in this day, I am still God's girl. My identity is sure and solid, no matter what.

Speaker 1: 25:25

Right, let's give an example of what you were talking about reminding myself of what God says is true about me, about you, about me, about who we are, because he says so. And that way we'll give an example to the listeners of how you can I mean proactively, preemptively, before I've got a bad attitude about the dentist or about homeschooling today or whatever it might be when I am in my bed in the morning going, oh my gosh, not another day, I'm going to say hold everything. I'm going to capture that thought, surrender it to obedience to Christ. What is true, god is. This is a day you have made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.

Speaker 2: 26:10

God is. This is a day you have made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. What is true is that you are with me and you have actually gone before me in this day. You're already ahead of me.

Speaker 1: 26:16

Yes, I like that. What is true, God is nothing about this day is going to take you by surprise, even though it might take me by surprise. If I turn to you, you will grant me wisdom and strength and everything I need to be able to navigate through it.

Speaker 2: 26:35

Okay, here comes one of my favorites. What is true is that I don't have to be amazing. I don't have to be perfect or amazing or anywhere close. I can just be exactly as I am and God will work through me. Whatever his purposes are, he'll equip me in the moment. I don't have to be amazing. Someone out there needs to hear that today.

Speaker 1: 27:01

Yes, yes. And someone else out there needs to hear this today I can't hate myself into positive change. Yes, I can't Right and won't even try. I'm not going to beat myself up.

Speaker 2: 27:15

Yes, what is true is that my thoughts are important and I get to choose what they are right here, right now.

Speaker 1: 27:23

Yes, and one other thing that is true is God has called me to be his beloved girl and given me a purpose and the power to fulfill it.

Speaker 2: 27:35

Yes, what is true is that, no matter what happens today, no matter what happens today, god will work it out for good.

Speaker 1: 27:46

Yeah, I want to give just a moment for the listener to come up with their own. Okay, so what is true, listener, in your day-to-day? What is true for you right now? What is true from God's perspective, when you're thinking with the mind of Christ? What is true? Ooh, I wish I could hear what they say. I know, I wish I could too.

Speaker 2: 28:10

Do you have one more for us? What is true is that the work that God needs to get done today is not dependent on my ability to perform.

Speaker 1: 28:22

Yay, awesome, yay, all right. So that's what we've got for you today. We want to think with the mind of Christ about the situations we face. Let's take captive those habitual thoughts that come into our minds, that we allow to drive our behavior, and we want to instead trade them out for God's wonderful truth, and his wonderful truth is going to give us what we need for life and godliness. Yes, he promises it.

Speaker 2: 28:55

So when you're feeling unsettled, when you're feeling insecure out of sorts, don't wish it away. Right Stop and say hold everything and go to the Lord and ask him what's true right now.

Speaker 1: 29:11

What are your thoughts? What is your mind? What are your thoughts?

Speaker 2: 29:14

Yes, oh, we're so glad you've been here today, very glad, and we hope that you'll join us for our next episode of Revelation. Women, women, oh my God. Bye for now, bye.