Speaker 1: 0:02

Hi and welcome to our podcast, Revelation Within On the Go. I'm Heidi Bilesma-Epperson, one of your hosts and the owner and lead coach of the RevelationWithinorg ministry, and.

Speaker 2: 0:13

I'm Christina Motley, your other host, also a Revelation Within coach and Heidi's partner in all things Revelation Within, and we are so happy to invite you to join us for this episode of Revelation Within on the show.

Speaker 1: 0:36

Oh, I had an epiphany this week.

Speaker 2: 0:39

Yes, I know and I'm so excited for you to share it.

Speaker 1: 0:44

Yes, and so we're going to dive into something that has been changing the way I know, and I'm so excited for you to share it. Yes, and so we're going to dive into something that has been changing the way I live. It's like why did it take me 63 years to get this one figured out? No, and anyway, I hope that somebody who might be listening will be blessed by it too. Of course, and really I'm not kidding as we go on and talk about it. It seems so profound to me and yet so simple. It's kind of crazy.

Speaker 2: 1:18

Isn't that so often how it goes with us in the Lord? It's like, oh my gosh, I've had this life-changing time with him and it's usually something simple, but it's so profound and I'm so excited that we're sharing this today. Heidi, thank you for just being so open and vulnerable and ready to share. I know it's already blessed me immensely to hear about this. So this is going to be such a meaningful conversation. It's going to be all about motivation, but not the kind that you chase, which I can relate to just chasing, chasing, running, running, and it's just kind of always slipping through your fingers. That's not what we're talking about. We're talking about, we're going to talk about the kind of motivation that flows from who you are and what you truly value.

Speaker 2: 2:06

So it goes, goes deep.

Speaker 1: 2:08

It comes from a place it does it does. So I'm just going to start us off by praying, just a quick prayer. Jesus, would you speak clearly to us today and to those listening. Help us uncover the truth beneath our habits and our reactions and show us the difference between living from a place of what we feel like doing, or feel like being, and that place of living from our values. Lead us into freedom, into a place of joy, into a place of confidence. Thank you, lord, amen, amen, amen.

Speaker 1: 2:48

Well, here's what I've realized. I can't stop thinking about it and I can't stop thanking God. But here it is in a nutshell If I wait until I feel like doing something, it may never happen. Until I feel like doing something, it may never happen. Duh. But if I move and act and live from my values, that's a different story and that's probably again, it's probably pretty obvious. But the ramifications are so broad and so deep. When I act based on how I feel, it's usually in the moment, but when I act from my values, it's rooted in who I actually am, especially the fact that I am in Christ.

Speaker 2: 3:35

Wow, that is so real. I wonder what it means. No, I know we're going to talk about it and kind of explain, but that I mean just that in itself is you've already grabbed me, heidi and it explains why motivation feels so slippery sometimes. Because feelings are slippery, they're valid, they're real, they're important, but boy are they slippery.

Speaker 1: 4:06

Yeah, they change so quickly, on a dime sometimes. So we're going to start with a hard truth though so it's going to get good after that.

Speaker 2: 4:16

Okay, okay.

Speaker 1: 4:17

And that is Jeremiah. 17, verses nine and 10 tell us that the heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Wow, who can understand it? The word says I, the Lord, search the heart and examine the mind.

Speaker 2: 4:37

That is a hard truth, I know right it really is.

Speaker 1: 4:42

It is, but the bottom line is, when we're driven by our feelings, whether we feel like doing something or not, we're often being led by something that just isn't grounded. Feelings are so fickle.

Speaker 2: 4:54

Yes, they are.

Speaker 1: 4:56

But when we live from what God has been writing on our hearts in our relationship with him over the course of our lives, hearts in our relationship with him over the course of our lives.

Speaker 2: 5:08

That's a completely different experience. And there's a big, big smile on Heidi's face right now. She's just glowing. So true, Heidi. Feelings they come and go, and come again and go, and there they are again. But values, especially the ones shaped by God, those anchor us.

Speaker 1: 5:29

Yeah, that's so true and I'm sure you've seen that. We've talked about this. How have you seen it in your own life? Are there moments, for instance, christina, where feelings tried to run the show, but you had to remember who am I? What is my deeper value system like? Is it congruent with what I'm feeling like doing?

Speaker 2: 5:53

Have you ever felt that way? Oh, my goodness, like a million, gazillion times. Yeah, I feel like for years and years, my feelings did run the show. I let them run the show. I had no understanding of the renewing of the mind, or feelings did run the show for me.

Speaker 2: 6:14

I really struggled with that and I remember thinking is there a possible way to deal with feelings that is like healthy and healing, like why do we even have them if they're just constantly messing me up? That's what I used to think. You know, and people. I heard people say, well, god gave you feelings and I thought, well, I wish you would take them away because they are driving me. And I did feel like that for a long time. One of the best examples, I think, for me is fear when something is happening and you are afraid. Like I can think of times with the kids when I was really, really fearful, times with my parents, times in our financial situation, times with health, things that happen, and there's this fear that comes up and it is so easy to let the fear take over.

Speaker 2: 7:13

It's so easy, and every time you, you know, have kind of a quiet moment and your thoughts do what they want to do. Yeah there it is and it's. It's like no, I don't want fear to rule my life, I don't want any feeling to rule my life, but that's kind of the default, especially if we don't know what to do next.

Speaker 1: 7:39

Right, so true.

Speaker 1: 7:41

I don't know if you've ever felt this way, christina, or our listeners perhaps, but recently I had been going through kind of a pattern where every morning I would wake up and I felt so burdened, like there was this huge boulder sitting on top of me and I was struggling with my motivation about anything, because I felt such heaviness and I knew that there was a spiritual component to it, certainly, and there definitely was an emotional one, but it did feel so physical as well.

Speaker 1: 8:16

I didn't even want to do ministry work which is bizarre, because I love what I get to do and I didn't care about my food and eating. It wasn't that I was overeating, it was that I was just grabbing what sounded good in the moment, even though it made me feel cruddy, and then I didn't want to move my body, I just want to. Well, what I wanted to do was either go back to sleep or play video games all day. Okay, just being honest here. And then, of course, giving into those urges because I wasn't feeling like doing anything else resulted in shame. So I was feeling shame, and then I would self-soothe by more video games or more eating of the Oreos, when I would probably need some nourishment instead of just Oreos.

Speaker 1: 9:06

So I was caught in this cycle and it was all rooted in. Well, I don't feel like getting up or I don't feel like doing something else, and someone I know sent me a link to a short, three minute long video. And it pointed out, when looking for motivation, feelings aren't really good.

Speaker 2: 9:30

You know what? That's so true, isn't that?

Speaker 1: 9:33

profound though I mean duh, I know that. But what is a really good motivator? The values I have, my, again, they're fickle, and we speak all the time in our, in our ministry, about feelings, don't get to define what is true, what is fact and how facts can inform my feelings. But what about values? I love this because my values are where the God piece and the Heidi piece kind of come together and and it's who I am and what I am because of him. My values have been forged over my lifetime with the Lord.

Speaker 1: 10:13

You know, I wish it would be enough for me to say well, the Lord wants me to do X, y or Z. There's times when that doesn't cut it. And so this, this approach, this thought of what do I really value? Well, I value being healthy, I value being active, I value being somebody who knows God's word and and can base my life in that truth, those are my values. So, rather than just tell myself well, it's sin if you don't do this, which has not been very motivating for me, I'm sorry, I'm admitting it at least no, no, I think that a lot of us can relate to that.

Speaker 2: 10:56

I certainly can.

Speaker 1: 10:58

Yeah, my values. They've evolved over a long time and they will continue to, I'm sure, but they represent what I, what I really respond to as being God honoring. No matter how I feel when asked about my values, it feels like I'm coming home to truth, not just my truth, but God's truth in my life that he has. You know, I picture somebody working with clay to get the air bubbles out of it, and I picture God has worked my life like clay to put his values into me and anything that is extraneous to that out. And so it's like what do I really value? It's huge. You know what I mean. Or am I just like barking up a crazy tree?

Speaker 2: 11:45

No, no, no, it's so good. You've got my mind like going in all different directions and thinking about all the different things. But one of the things that I'm thinking, heidi, I've known you for 11 and a half years and you have super strong values. You do you know what you value, super strong values. You do you know what you value and there's a real depth there, like it's not kind of wishy-washy, well, I'm not sure. Well, I mean, you really know and it is rooted in the word and it's your values are rooted in God's truth for sure. But that's really strong in you, like you're, you're passionate about your values. So you know, that makes me think well, what about me? What are my values? What's going on with me?

Speaker 2: 12:29

And the first thing that comes to mind for me is relationship. Relationship is huge for me. Like I almost value relationships over anything else in my life, right, my husband has talked about that before. Oh well, you're all about relationship, you know. And so for me, coming from a place of what is that deep value that brings me passion?

Speaker 2: 12:53

You know, as a teacher, I was so passionate about my relationships with students and coworkers and in my own family, of course, it's like everything my kids and time with them and conversations with them, and my husband, of course, is, incredibly, you know, an amazing relationship that I've had for years my relationship with the Lord. I mean I value that deeply. I value that so deeply. And then, of course, my relationship with Revelation Within, with you, heidi, my best friend, and all that we do here. I mean I value that so much. I get excited and I think, well, what is it like in me when I'm noticing what I value? How does my body respond? How do I feel? I get excited. You know, I want to talk about it, I want to share about it, I want to be there in it as much as possible. I'm drawn to it. I'm drawn to what I value.

Speaker 1: 14:00

I like that. I appreciate you mentioned that and we probably want to pause and kind of define what our values I mean you've got a good idea.

Speaker 1: 14:11

Really. This is how I've kind of come to see it. Your values, my values, are kind of the convictions and priorities that God has formed in you. Sometimes it comes through scripture, prayer, life experience and relationship with him, as well as relationships with others and how they have influenced us. It's like it's been steeping in our lives for a long time. It's not just about how much sleep we got or how well nourished we are or how well rested Like. Here are a few of my values.

Speaker 1: 14:44

Of course, I value freedom in Christ. Yes, as soon as somebody starts trying to put limitations on my freedom in Christ, I get squeamish. And if I do that to myself, I get squeamish, you know. That's why checklists are not my favorite thing anymore. They used to be, but I, my values, have changed. I value being strong enough to care for myself and others, and when I'm in a place as I have been, to be honest, with you for the last 10 years where I don't feel the strength I have felt previously when I realized that I'm living from that place, I want to do what I can to get strong enough to be able to care for myself and others. It's a value I hold and I've forgotten that because I've kind of because I think I've been kind of depressed about not being so strong anymore.

Speaker 1: 15:42

So it's like it's fed itself. And then I value stewarding my body in a way that honors the Lord but also honors my body, my body has done a lot in my life.

Speaker 2: 15:52

Take care of me.

Speaker 1: 15:54

I also value enjoying nature and not being sidelined because I'm feeling cruddy you know, cruddy because of inflamed joints from what I ate the day before or whatever it might be. I love being outside and I can enjoy hikes and whatnot when I have taken care of certain things. But if I am living from a place of well, I don't feel like it, or if I do feel like it or whatever, I'm not going to make the same choices. I'm going to make different choices than I will if I do feel like it or whatever. I'm not going to make the same choices. I'm going to make different choices than I will if I live from my values. What do you think about that?

Speaker 2: 16:31

Yeah, I think it's awesome. Like I said, I'm just kind of thinking about everything while you're talking, but I, I love this idea because you know, like I said in me, certainly when I think about what I really value, it does bring a motivation that comes from deep within. Um, it's not just you know. Well, maybe I should do this, this would be better. Oh, I don't want to, and and kind of we all do that.

Speaker 2: 16:59

I think we kind of get stuck in this place of I don't know, kind of this medium land or something. But you know where we're not. We're not really one way or the other. But when we talk about values and I'm thinking about other people I know, and how they act and talk and speak, what they say when they're talking about something they value, you know you can tell they're like animated, their facial expressions are, you know, different, like their eyebrows are going up and down, and you know they might be using their hands when they talk and they start thinking about examples and all of a sudden, you know they're just you've kind of got them hooked Like they're talking about their stuff, what they value.

Speaker 2: 17:47

So I think this is just amazing for me. Well, I talked about how much I value relationships. It's like, oh my gosh, if I could just be with friends and family all day long on the beach somewhere.

Speaker 1: 18:02

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 18:03

I value what you said, heidi. You said I value freedom in Christ. Yes, and I would add to that I value not living in a place where I am chained by strongholds.

Speaker 1: 18:19

Oh, yes, I mean boy.

Speaker 2: 18:21

I did that for a long, long time and that is. One of my deepest values now is I'm not living there anymore. I am not living in a place of being trapped by a stronghold. That's one of my big ones.

Speaker 1: 18:36

I bet a lot of people listening can identify with that. We identify with that. Yet many of us and I guess I'll speak about me I identify with that. I want to live my.

Speaker 1: 18:47

One of the deepest values I have is I want to live from that place of freedom and freedom from strongholds, from them owning me, my thoughts, my behaviors, et cetera, and the regret that goes with giving into them. And yet so very often I have lived from a place of feelings. It's like I don't feel like making that choice. That would be that coincides with my value system. And boy I mean it's like hello, heidi, wake up. When I don't live according to my values, I am guaranteeing that I'm going to continue to defy them. Sort of it's like I've been living in a place that I think is not where I want to be at all. It's not in agreement with my value system at all. When I think of how much time I have spent numbing out with a video game over the past few months well, how about 10 years? Oh, my goodness. Anyway, when I think about that, it's like what have I missed?

Speaker 1: 19:53

that my value system longs to propel me into, to move me forward through to adventure with, and you can tell right now because of the way I'm talking about it my voice inflection, my hand motions.

Speaker 2: 20:08

Her eyebrows are going up and down.

Speaker 1: 20:12

Yes, and I think all of us to some degree. We are wired to live according to our values. And yet we let our feelings drive the bus so often. And I don't just mean like, well, I'm feeling sad today. I don't mean that, I mean like right now, in the moment, I don't feel like running the vacuum. Okay, that sounds so, but I value having a home that's tidy. So when I think about that, I want to get up and take care of it. Right, you know it's sort of interesting.

Speaker 2: 20:43

Yeah, it is. I guess another one of my values that you know are just is just huge is well, it came to me because what you just said about being owned by something, so another one of my values is who am I in Christ? That's huge to me. That's something I didn't understand and I'm I'm still trying to wrap my brain around it.

Speaker 2: 21:04

For for years I thought my identity was what I did. I thought my identity was how much I could do, how much I could perform accomplishments, stuff like that, and that's not who I am at all. And then, when I got hit with chronic illness and all these other things, it's like, wait a minute, who am I? Am I? Am I this, am I that? And then what about that role that just goes away because of this or that? No, that's not my identity. I'm very excited to say you know my eyebrows are going up and down when I say that my identity is in Christ. I am his girl, end of story. That's my identity. All those other roles will fall away and will come and go. You know things will go up and down, but my identity that's a huge value for me is walking that out, even though, like I said, I'm still trying to wrap my brain around it. It's a work in progress, but um, that's a big one for me too.

Speaker 1: 22:06

Oh, me too. Me too, because when I live from all those other things, a sense of identity based on what I do or the role I play in life, oh my goodness. Yeah, it's fleeting. It can be impacted by things other people do, by weather, I mean. It can be impacted by all kinds of things. Yeah, yeah, all right so let's do some practical stuff here for a minute.

Speaker 1: 22:29

Great listener, if you, if you can or want to grab a journal, or you can just reflect on these questions as you listen If you're driving in a car, of course, don't don't have a journal and consider. This is one of the things I mean. I think this little process can help with you, with me, with Christina, kind of understanding what our value system is. If you aren't sure what is something. The first question is what brings you joy when you walk in alignment with it? What brings you joy when you're walking in alignment with it, christina? What's something that brings you joy when you're walking in alignment with it?

Speaker 2: 23:16

Yeah, you know what, when I am intentionally caring for my body well, that brings me joy. And sometimes the result is not feeling great because I do deal with chronic illness. But there is a joy in me when I know that I'm caring for the body well that God gave me. I spent so many years being very mad at my body really hating my body many, many years being disappointed by my body and now so much once.

Speaker 2: 23:52

One of my values really, you know, is I want to take care of this body that God made for me fearfully and wonderfully. This is his gift to me. I will not get another one. This is the only body I get in this life. When I'm walking that out, it feels so good and I experience a lot of joy, like deep joy even if I'm not feeling well. Like deep joy even if I'm not feeling well, which is kind of bizarre, but it really. It's amazing how that is.

Speaker 1: 24:24

Yes, that's such a beautiful answer. Okay. Second question then what matters to you more than momentary comfort? Wow, and you know, I know for me, living in that place of momentary comfort quite a bit over the last 10 years, I'll say, but I'm thinking specifically of the last few months it matters to me that I contribute in some way to the lives of those I care about and the community that I care about, that God has entrusted me with the revelation within ministry. Momentary comfort would keep me away from my laptop, keep me away from doing the work that he's called me to, that I get so much joy out of when I do it.

Speaker 1: 25:12

I mean really my answer to that first one what brings you joy when you're walking in alignment with it? I love what we get to do, walking in alignment with it. I love what we get to do. I do too. It boggles my mind that I would ever not want to get up and get going on the things God's given me to do. And so what matters to me more than momentary comfort?

Speaker 1: 25:32

you listener, you person in our community you I mean that's just an example of, and so, even if I'm uncomfortable, I and would rather lay in bed for some reason, I value contributing in some way, living the mission and the purpose that God has called me to.

Speaker 2: 25:55

Wow, that's awesome, heidi. I love the way you said that. I love it.

Speaker 2: 26:01

That's just makes me so excited because you know I share those values with you too, of course, and we have so much fun, heidi and I, doing this together. We do. We have so much fun even when it's hard. We still have so much fun doing this together. So what matters to me more than momentary comfort? You know, more and more and more it's becoming more valuable to me to know that God is at work and what is he doing, and I want to be in line with that. I don't want to be in his way. I don't want to be pushing against it more and more. I'm trusting him with that. Oh beautiful.

Speaker 1: 26:44

And that's that's hard.

Speaker 2: 26:45

That's really hard because God allows hard things, really, really hard he does. I think that a lot of my prayers used to be about comfort Lord, fix this, make this easier, make my path straight. This person that's suffering, can you just take that away? I mean, I still pray like that. But what I realized? What is God valuing in that discomfort? What's his plan? What's his purpose? There's something there that's really big. So my prayers are changing from fix that, take it away, make it less, make it easier, make life easier. You know my prayers are changing from that to may your will be done, get your work done. Lord, whatever it is, I know you're good, do what you do best, best. Weave our lives together, weave the situations in. You know, use these things to bring people's hearts to you rather than just make it all easy.

Speaker 1: 27:50

Right, right. And it's interesting because sometimes he chooses the painful road to accomplish those very things that we see as beautiful and wonderful in the long haul.

Speaker 2: 28:06

All right.

Speaker 1: 28:06

So the first two questions again are what brings you joy when you're walking in alignment with it. Number two is what matters to you more than momentary comfort. And the third one is what do you value because of what God has taught you, not just what culture or the experts so-called experts say what do you value because of what God has taught you?

Speaker 1: 28:31

Not just what culture or diet books say? And if you do have a chance to write your responses to these questions, it can be really helpful. I know that I think, with all the thoughts I'm putting into this value versus feelings thing lately, I'm definitely gonna do some journaling because I wanna have a record of what are the things I value, because when I'm reminded of those, I have motivation.

Speaker 1: 28:58

Remember, that's what we're looking at. Yeah, motivation. If we wait for our feelings to motivate us, it could be a long wait. Yeah, it could be never. Yeah, my value system is always there and it can produce in me things that I could never see if I wait for feelings.

Speaker 2: 29:19

Yeah, wow. So if you were journaling this, this is something that you might write because of what God has shown me, I value. And then you start writing and then, when I act from my values, I feel well.

Speaker 1: 29:35

I think it's cool how you even identified it. You know, when you start getting animated and excited and voice inflections and all of this, then you've probably stumbled on something that you value. There's some connection there, and so when I act from my values, I feel you said it excited, I feel motivated, I feel totally that heaviness that I shared at the beginning of the episode. That heaviness lifts, it's just not going to hold me back. I mean, now that may not always be true, I don't know, but it is this week. Well, what about?

Speaker 2: 30:11

feeling satisfied. You know what about contentment and what about? Well, you talked about your want to. We talk about that a lot. You know how do I increase my want?

Speaker 1: 30:23

to. Well, here it is, you know here it is.

Speaker 2: 30:25

Take a look and see. It's like what are you valuing? Also life giving you know what is life giving to you, what makes you excited, happy, what makes you laugh, what makes you want to do it. That's all mixed in there, with your values to do it.

Speaker 1: 30:40

That's all mixed in there with your values, exactly.

Speaker 2: 30:42

Yeah, and I love what you shared, heidi, about the vacuum, because it's so simple. It's like, well, you know that's so simple, but actually it's true, it's your. There is a deeper value. Yes, you enjoy for you. And Michael, you want a neat, tidy, not, like you know, crazy tidy but just peaceful.

Speaker 2: 31:01

You want a peaceful home. This morning when I got to my desk on my porch it was like wrecked. I mean, there was crap everywhere. It's so like cluttered and junky and it's making me nuts this morning and I realized I value having a workspace that is peaceful and I need to take some time to put things away and fix this up. It's like ridiculous. There's a deeper value there. You know I long for that peace.

Speaker 1: 31:34

Right.

Speaker 2: 31:34

So even that example is is so, so good.

Speaker 1: 31:38

Yeah, okay. Galatians five verses 16 and 17 says so. I say this is Paul writing to the people at Galatia walk by the spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. This just came home to me in a whole new way when I read this, because gratifying the desires of my flesh, that's. It's like I don't feel like doing that.

Speaker 2: 32:02

Or I feel like doing that.

Speaker 1: 32:04

That's gratifying the desires of my flesh. It's like whoa. I never saw myself in that verse quite so clearly. The cool thing is, the Holy Spirit isn't impulsive. He leads with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. It's not denying our feelings, but it's not letting them drive the bus Right, Exactly. And so here's kind of where it gets practical. Let's say, I don't feel like moving my body today or preparing food that I know makes me feel good. If I check in with my feelings, do I feel like doing this? I'm probably going to stay in the recliner or stay under the covers. I hate to admit that, but it's true. If I check in with my values, though, it's okay. What do I really want? What do I? What's deeper than how I feel? Is this choice consistent with who God has been forming me to be? And it's like it unlocks a deeper kind of motivation which is huge.

Speaker 1: 33:16

You know, I remember over the course of the years that I coached and whatnot, one-on-one. A lot of times people had an event that they were motivated to lose weight for, and it's like I remember even back then thinking, oh, but, but the event's going to come and go and it'll be over. With what then, you know? And so I am really glad that it's not about a one time event, but and it's not even about my feelings, it's about something so much deeper that God wants to use in my life to help me say yes to him. Really, that's what it boils down to.

Speaker 2: 33:54

Oh, I love that, heidi. I love that. So that kind of motivation that you're talking about, heidi, is much more sustainable than, okay, I'm just going to pull up those bootstraps, I'm just going to grit my teeth. How long does that last? Yeah, it doesn't last, it falls apart. But this won't fall apart because these are from the values that God has built in us, like you said, and they line up with his values, which is life, and so it comes from identity, not from impulse.

Speaker 1: 34:33

Right.

Speaker 2: 34:33

Okay, so let's ask ourselves a few more questions, just to kind of reflect, and you're welcome to write these down and journal about them later, or just think about them, take them to the Lord. So here's the first one what area of life have I been waiting for feelings to change? Wow, that's powerful. What area of life have I been waiting for feelings to change? So we're kind of like stuck in this place. It's like, well, the feelings haven't changed, nothing is changing. What are we waiting for? How long have you?

Speaker 2: 35:12

been waiting and where is that in your life we all have areas like that.

Speaker 1: 35:18

We could wait a long time and it might never change. Yes, that's so good.

Speaker 2: 35:23

The next one is what values has God already placed in me that can guide that area instead? What are those values that God has already placed in me? And then here's a big, beautiful, open-ended question what kind of person do I long to become? We get to choose. Do I long to become? We get to choose. We actually get to choose, which is so amazing, and I just love the way this, the hope that is in this message today, heidi.

Speaker 1: 35:58

Yay, we can turn those questions that Christina just asked us to ponder into kind of a rhythm. So one is feel check Okay, what do I feel like doing which we know is probably not the best way to make decisions necessarily and then to value check what do I value in this moment? No, and that's the cool thing, feelings are going to come and go and ebb and flow and all that stuff, but my values are going to be pretty solid because they're rooted in who I am in Christ and what God has been kind of working into my life. And so, first of all, field check what do I feel like doing, value check what do I value in this moment? And then the decision what action now reflects my values, not just my feelings.

Speaker 2: 36:48

Wow, I was just thinking about my marriage, like just using this with my marriage, that would just like. What do you feel like in the moment? Feelings Well, okay, well and then. But what do I value in this moment? Wow, I mean just in one relationship. What a, what a change that could be good point.

Speaker 1: 37:10

I'm I'm getting an application for that in my life too.

Speaker 1: 37:13

Thank you, yeah, good good, good one of our participants, wanda, who we love dearly, love, love dearly. Yes, she has kind of established a little tool that I have used recently. That's really helped me with this feelings and values thing and motivation, and she calls it first thought, second thought, I think. And, christina, can you tell us about that a little bit, since I know Wanda is one of your one-on-one ladies? I think you can explain this tool way better than I can, even though I'm using it.

Speaker 2: 37:48

Yeah, well, we've both been in coaching relationships with Wanda. She is just an amazing, amazing person. We highly respect her and value her wisdom and strength. So, yeah, it's my joy and honor to work with her, that's for sure. So this is an idea she came up with quite a while ago and it's come kind of in and out of her experience with her journey with food, eating, body, all those things, and it's just kind of come up again, so we'll share it. She calls it first thought, second thought. So basically, whatever it is where you're, you know whatever decision you're making, whether it's what you're going to do or whether it's what you're going to eat or whether it's you know what you're going to say or not. Say you can apply this to anything. Really, for her, when she first came up with it, it had to do with food and eating. And so your first thought, the first thought that comes into our mind after years and years of thinking a certain way is likely to be not what you value.

Speaker 2: 38:52

It's likely to be driven by feelings. It's likely to be driven by old patterns, destructive patterns. It's like a default. It's. You know, something you have thought for a long, long time, something, yeah, that's the first thought, and it's usually not life-giving. So, especially when you're working on something that you're trying to get out of, a certain pattern, stronghold, that kind of thing. So that's the first thought. Then you take a moment, invite the Holy Spirit to give you wisdom, just a quick little pause. It's so quick, lord. What do you think Basically? That's kind of what it is. And then the second thought comes in.

Speaker 2: 39:35

The second thought is going to be life-giving. It's going to be something that lines up with your deeper values, like what we're talking about. It's going to line up with what God wants for us. It's something good. It might not be something easy, but it's going to be something good. So then, going with that second thought, and more and more as you do, that it becomes easier. You know, over time, it becomes easier to choose what's better. And so those first thoughts begin to change as well. Those old patterns begin to break down, and it's just so exciting to see and this is what I've seen in Wanda, this is what I've seen in her. Those first thoughts have changed, those old patterns have been broken and those second thoughts are coming and it's easier and easier. It's just a beautiful process. So that's first thought, second thought, and you can grab that and use it later today.

Speaker 1: 40:38

Yeah, thank you so much. I know that right before I heard about that I had experienced a first thought, second thought moment, even independent from hearing about that tool.

Speaker 1: 40:49

So it's fun because we can take what we're talking about with motivation and values and feelings and recognize that feelings are going to be right there. That's going to be my first thought a lot of times for now, until I've trained myself otherwise, and then inviting the Holy Spirit in. I want to be making decisions, even things that seem maybe trivial. They may not be. They may not be. I want to make the decisions that I live from from a place of the my value system. God has worked long and hard with me on developing this value system and I am blessed by you know, having these values and knowing that it's rooted in him, and I want to live from that place.

Speaker 1: 41:35

So, you don't have to be ruled by your feelings either. You too are anchored in Christ, and God has been forming and shaping his values for you in your life as well. And why not live from that place? If you're struggling at all, like I have been, with letting my emotions not even emotions, but just the instantaneous feeling I have drive me, then you know living from the values that you hold is going to be a much richer, more meaningful God honoring, body honoring.

Speaker 1: 42:09

I mean it's going to be a great place to live from, and it's what truly matters.

Speaker 2: 42:15

As you're talking, Heidi, all these ideas are going through my mind about areas in my life where I could, you know, use this kind of thinking about. What are you feeling and then what are the values? I love it, you know we don't. We don't have to wait to feel ready. That's a pretty powerful statement. We don't have to wait to feel ready. We already have values that are worth acting on, because God has lovingly placed them inside of us. He's already given those to us as a gift.

Speaker 1: 42:51

Yeah, listener, if you want support walking that out and having a group of people rally around you who are of the same mind, we have a private online community for that and you are welcome to try us out free for one month. Just visit revelationwithinorg to learn more, and we would love to have you, even if you bail after a month. That's fine. We just want to have a chance to support you and encourage you.

Speaker 2: 43:20

Yes, come and join us. Come and join us. We'd love, love, love to see you there. So I'll go ahead and close in prayer. All righty, lord Jesus, thank you for not leaving us stuck in feelings. Thank you, god. Thank you for our feelings, yes, but we don't want to be stuck there. Thank you, Lord. Thank you for anchoring us in identity, in truth and in your spirit. Lord, show us what matters most and help us to move forward in that. We trust you, lord, we love you In Jesus' name, amen.

Speaker 1: 43:55

Amen, until next time. Live loved, live grounded and live from your values.

Speaker 2: 44:02

All right, we are so glad that you've been here today and we would love to invite you to join us for our next episode of Revelation Within on the go. Yay, see you next time. See you next time, bye-bye, bye.