Speaker 1: 0:01

Hi and welcome to Revelation Within On the Go. I'm Heidi Bilesma Epperson, one of your hosts and the owner and lead coach of RevelationWithinorg.

Speaker 2: 0:12

And I'm Christina Motley, your other host, also a Revelation Within coach and Heidi's partner in all things Revelation Within, and we are so happy to invite you to join us for this episode of Revelation Within on the go. Arms in the air for that one. Oh, we're so excited to be here today.

Speaker 1: 0:41

Well, hey, we're going to talk about something that we all have experienced, and we do experience it quite frequently, every, every day. We have choices that we can make right.

Speaker 2: 0:52

Yes, Every day, yeah, every every moment, really.

Speaker 1: 0:56

Really, that's true. Every moment is a choice, or it seems like it. Anyway, we continue what we're doing, or change it up, or do this or that. Anyway, what motivates our choices? Though? That is a good question that we're going to have a look at today. Yeah. What are the options for? What could possibly possibly motivate my choices? What do you think?

Speaker 2: 1:22

Well, there's a lot of things that can motivate, I know. For me, a big one is emotions. Well, how am I feeling? Well, is it good, is it bad? Is it sideways? You know, how was yesterday, how was today, how was the, you know, five minutes ago? Emotions are a big one for me and over the years I have had to figure out how to pull apart emotions from some of the things that I do, because it gets all tangled in.

Speaker 1: 1:52

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 1:53

I don't want my emotions to dictate my decision-making.

Speaker 1: 1:56

Oh, that's a good point. I know for me, one of the things that kind of impacts my decision making is what will people think? Oh, of course, of course, and really when push comes to shove, I don't know what people will think.

Speaker 1: 2:16

And so I'm just kind of making up a story to go with. Either way, I go on something and I could stop and invite God into that and say what are your thoughts about it and be free of that. It's like a tyranny, really worrying about what people think can really just be like a ball and chain around my ankles or something.

Speaker 2: 2:37

Yeah, that's for sure. How about past experiences?

Speaker 1: 2:42

That's a big one, I think.

Speaker 2: 2:45

Well, how did this happen in the past? What happened to me before? If I had a bad experience with this particular choice, I might be very hesitant. I might be giving way too much power to what happened in the past. Or if it was very positive for me, I might be going into it without really thinking it through, because last time it went so well, it'll go well this time. Maybe I don't even need to prepare whatever it is. So I think past experiences can hinder us sometimes. You know, when we're making decisions can be a huge motivator for us.

Speaker 1: 3:26

We could probably list even more things, but we have a particular direction we want to head with today's podcast.

Speaker 2: 3:34

So many have come to us over the years seeking help with their bodies or for eating their bodies, or for eating. But the deeper work is not about what's on the plate, it's what's in the heart. Romans 12, 2,. It's our cornerstone verse. We love the truth. In this verse. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. The world constantly whispers and sometimes yells, shouts, screams at us. Performance, performance. It's all about performance. What can you do and how fast and how much? But God, but God.

Speaker 2: 4:21

God invites transformation from inside out, so our choices reflect grace, not guilt.

Speaker 1: 4:30

And this is where I really wanted us to kind of focus some time and attention on, because so many of us have been swept up in shape-shifting and attempting to change the way we eat, the way we move, so that our bodies will change into a size or shape that we like. We often become driven by a sense of I should do this, I should do that, and it's really duty and performance oriented, and it's not because I'm delighting in the Lord, it's not because I'm delighting in the Lord. It's not because I'm delighting in this body that he's entrusted to my care. It's kind of sad, in a way, when you think about it.

Speaker 2: 5:15

Well, it's kind of a sad way to live, really. We give so much of our kind of bandwidth. You know our thoughts to that. You know I was thinking. Our family went on this trip recently, for three weeks, you know, and it was incredible, it was wonderful, it was amazing. I wouldn't trade it for the world. But you know, what I realized when I got back was that for three weeks, every day, all day, I was in pictures. Every day, all day, I was in pictures. That's, that's a long time. Yeah, we took pictures everywhere of everything, because every day we were somewhere new.

Speaker 1: 5:56

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 5:57

And so for me there was this constant pressure of what am I going to look like in the picture? And then of course, I was in charge of deleting all the bad ones. But some of the relatives would take pictures and they would send them to me and I was like, oh my gosh, I would never choose that picture. Like delete that one. And I thought, wait a minute, wait a minute. What's important here? Like delete that one. And I thought, wait a minute, wait a minute, what's important here? It was really driving me, you know and there was a real pressure there.

Speaker 2: 6:30

When we got home I didn't take a picture for a long time because I was kind of tired of that focus. Um, and of course the focus is we love being here, we're together, we're seeing things, we're enjoying. But for me who you know, for me, I mean I've had body image issues since I was a young teenager.

Speaker 2: 6:54

Those old lies and thoughts came right up you know every day when we were taking all these pictures and the comparison. Oh, I hate comparison. It just brings you right down. I think it's one of the enemy's favorite tools is comparison, and so I just felt so much relief and when I got home I had to really renew my mind about my body and just stop that focus. That's my old, those are my old patterns is to be so condemning about my own body, and I thought I'm not living that way that is a horrible way to live.

Speaker 2: 7:35

I want to go back to delighting in the Lord. I want to be motivated by delight and gratitude for what God has given me. He's given me this body. It doesn't look like everybody else's body, that's okay. This is the one he made just for me. I want to be delighting in my body, delighting in God who gave it to me. I want to be full of gratitude to be full of gratitude, not, you know, disappointment and comparison and condemnation.

Speaker 1: 8:14

Oh my gosh, I am so done with living in that place. Oh, I hear you. Yeah, you know, and really what we're talking about is is not about food and discipline, it's about devotion, and I kind of wonder what that looks like today and how we steward our bodies or steward the privilege really of eating, not as duty but as a response to this marvelous God of ours who loves us and is so generous with us. I mean, really, when you step back and think about it, how many years did we live? What should I eat? What shouldn't I eat? What should I do to lose weight? What shouldn't I do? I mean, it's all these shoulds, it's all about performance and it just it ends up being this bar we can never quite reach. It sets a standard that is impossible for us. It beats us down is what it does.

Speaker 2: 9:09

Well, and when you think about so many of the people that have come to you know, Thin Within now, Revelation Within over the years, just like you said, beaten down by this idea that they are not good enough, they're not enough.

Speaker 2: 9:26

They don't compare, they haven't done enough, they're not perfect enough. I mean, it's so strong. It's one of the biggest things, it's one of the biggest commonalities, really, with people that come to us and they feel that from everywhere their churches, even even their christian friends it's like I'm not enough, I'm a failure, I've never done enough, I've never kind of made it where I want to go. And then they, you know, bring in the fruits of the spirit and the self-discipline and it's like it just beats people down into the ground.

Speaker 2: 10:04

It's very hard to live that way, very, very hard.

Speaker 1: 10:08

And I don't think that God ever intended for you know the verse in Galatians 5 with the fruit of the spirit to be a club of condemnation beating us up.

Speaker 2: 10:18

No, no, not at all.

Speaker 1: 10:20

Not at all. No at all, not at all. No, you know. Let's. Let's look at motivation and taking care of who we are in the world. You know, whether it's our minds, our bodies, our, our time, our talent, our finances. What motivation makes sense If I'm going to be living a life that is given to the Lord and offering myself to him? I have options there, and definitely legalism and duty is one of those options. We just have talked about where that takes us. What's another option that is more synchronous or more in accordance with what God desires?

Speaker 2: 11:03

Well, if we know that God loves us utterly, completely, without any limits, why does motivation even matter? Because love invites response, not performance. It's relational. It's about a relationship when we see the heart of God. It's relational it's about a relationship when we see the heart of God generous kind present gratitude wells up and suddenly and I love this suddenly our choices begin to flow from how can I bless him? Not, how should I manage me? Yes, right, oh, my gosh, what a difference is there?

Speaker 1: 11:47

Yeah, definitely We've. We're in our last week of our first ever presentation, launching, teaching, whatever of transforming grace, discovering peaceful eating course. It's been 13 weeks with a lovely group of people. Oh my gosh, it's been amazing.

Speaker 1: 12:06

It has been so rich, and I know that a lot of times what strikes me as I'm preparing for the class and afterwards as I think about how the live zooms went and whatnot, I'm thinking, yes, there's a difference between shoulds and want tos, and when my want to takes over this area of my life, this delighting in the Lord, and I want to choose whatever it might be, because I love him and I'm grateful to him, because I am aware of his character and just how truly good he is, oh my goodness, it flips everything that I have done for decades on its list and what I did for decades didn't work. I mean, I could lose weight, I could shape shift and I could get stronger and I could get more fit, and I did many times but it didn't last and I was like so what is the difference? It's that I delight in the Lord and I want to offer my body and my mind and everything as a living sacrifice, like Romans 12 says.

Speaker 2: 13:18

Yeah, it is. It's that delighting, like you said, and devotion. We've got some D words going on here Delight and devotion. The motivation wells up in me the more I get to know who God is.

Speaker 1: 13:36

Yes, and that's why we start there so very often in our programs, our courses and our podcasts too, for that matter. We start with who is God and what does he say about me? Those two things are so important and it causes an igniting of love and appreciation and devotion and delight in his presence that no compulsion, no program, could ever, no must do, could ever match Never, I mean.

Speaker 2: 14:07

I thought for years that God was so disappointed in me. I thought he was upset with me. I thought he was tired of me in this one area. I mean I was okay In other areas. I was able to somehow make it happen being a teacher, being a mom, going to church, being involved the different things that I did but in this one area I stumbled constantly.

Speaker 2: 14:36

I tripped constantly with food and eating and gaining and losing and up and down and and here and this, and that I mean I was. I felt like the ultimate loser and failure in this area.

Speaker 2: 14:49

And I thought that God was impatient with me. I had made up and I'm sure the world helped me, but I had made up this view and the enemy too. I had made up this view of God. That was not true and also, I kept it very secret. I didn't go around telling people. Well, I feel like God's disappointed in me. I didn't do that. It was all very secret. Uh, I didn't go around telling people. Well, I feel like God's disappointed in me. Right, I didn't do that. It was all very secret. It was in the wee hours of the night when those tears would come and I had that bowl of whatever it was in front of me and I was just eating and eating because I felt so much shame. Shame is another commonality of the people that come to us. They are soaked in shame, just like I was and just like you were, heidi, for a long time. And shame is it's a killer, it's a joy killer and it's a liar and it's not from God.

Speaker 1: 15:47

No, no, it's not. In fact, he came so that we could experience freedom from condemnation, because he loves us so much. And so when we see his heart, when we truly I tell you we've got to start there. This is why we stopped talking all about weight loss and shape shifting and have focused so much on mind renewal. I have to think true thoughts about God. When I see him as he is generous and kind and present and just all of the many things that are true about him, I have a totally different perspective on him and he's not like a boogeyman keeping good and fun and wonderful things away from me. He has boundaries in my life because he cares about how precious I am and he knows what's best. But there's so much generosity from this God of ours my choices can flow from. I want to bless him, I want to honor him, I want to give him glory, I want him to to smile, and I think he smiled a lot more than we realized.

Speaker 2: 16:52

Oh, yes, yes. So I mean, what's the contrast there in terms of our lives and how we live and respond to people? You know the one if I'm living in secret, shame. I am depressed.

Speaker 2: 17:05

I am irritable, I'm criticizing others, I'm comparing, I'm in a really tough place or I'm pretending not to be. That was a big part of it too. But what about this? What about being motivated by devotion and delight in a God who is not disappointed and who is on the journey with us and who greets us with compassion and new mercies every single morning and it's always morning somewhere? I mean, I love the idea of living in joy and gratitude and love for my heavenly father, who is faithful and protecting me, and so the more I learn about who he really is, the more my motivation is all about that Pleasing him and loving him and being in relationship with him. It's life giving. The depression goes away, those awful thoughts of condemnation they go away as we fill our minds, renew our minds, with his thoughts.

Speaker 2: 18:12

Who he is. That's where we have to start, and then where do we go next?

Speaker 1: 18:16

Where I think we need to go next is what does God say is true about me and who I am? And when I really tap into what he says about me, I mean wow. He says I am chosen, I am beloved, I am called out of darkness into his marvelous light so that I can proclaim his praises and other things too.

Speaker 2: 18:37

Yes, I'm fearfully and wonderfully made. I belong to him, I'm a member of his family, I'm an heir to the throne. It goes on and on and on. We have lists of these from the word of God, with references.

Speaker 1: 18:51

Definitely, and you can get a copy of that at teamlifeisgoodcom. Forward slash identity. Let's look for a minute at Proverbs 16, 3. I'd like to anchor there for just a moment. It says commit your works to the Lord and your plans will be established.

Speaker 1: 19:11

Now, many of the people we've shared with you some of the things they have in common that come to us and have over the years we were thin within and then, when we switched to revelation within, they have so many things in common. One of the things some of them have in common with one another is they don't invite God into this area of their lives. They want to jump on whatever bandwagon is the new, improved plan from last year or whatever, and so this verse speaks directly to this, but we're going to take it from the perspective of delight or duty, okay. So again, proverbs 16, three says commit your works to the Lord and your plans will be established, and this isn't about perfection or duty, but it's for devotion. I mean, when you think of who God is and we've talked about that for a moment and who he says I am, don't you want to? Just, oh, my goodness, I just want to give him anything he could possibly find joy in in my life.

Speaker 2: 20:14

Yeah, well, and those are the two things that don't ever change, ever, ever. We can hang on to those like that rock jetty, where you used to live, heidi, on Catalina Island, that rock jetty. We can hang on to who God is and we can hang on to how he sees us, and they're not going anywhere and there is no condemnation in Christ.

Speaker 2: 20:38

We can cling to those truths. Knowing this truth is forever. It's for today and tomorrow, and it's not based on what we do or don't do. It's not about me, no, it's not. And that, oh, it's so freeing. It's so freeing. We can choose our thoughts, we can choose to think what is true forevermore. And it changes everything. It changes the way we respond, it changes the way we make decisions.

Speaker 1: 21:10

It changes.

Speaker 2: 21:11

When our choices come from commitment to him, not self-control, self-discipline, self, self, self, right, right, right, no, they become acts of worship. Wow, I mean, think about that. I want my life to be an act of worship. I want my life to be an act of worship. I want the choices that I make to be, for that reason, not out of some kind of duty or condemnation or some kind of pressure.

Speaker 1: 21:43

Yeah, no, not pressure.

Speaker 2: 21:46

No. So we move from duty into delight, and it changes everything.

Speaker 1: 21:55

It does, it really does. So, christina, how about you lead us through a breath prayer that reminds us of who God is and how I can respond out of that.

Speaker 2: 22:06

This is a very beautiful prayer. So remember breath. Praying is simply breathing and then saying God's truth. It could be a scripture, it could be a truth, it could be anything that lines up with scripture. It's so simple. It calms our bodies while filling our minds with truth, which fills our hearts really. So we're going to breathe in and say Lord, you are beautiful and good, and we're going to breathe out and say and I respond with delight, not duty. So let's take a nice deep breath and say Lord, you are beautiful and good, lord you are beautiful and good.

Speaker 2: 22:56

Breathe out and I respond with delight, not duty. One more time Nice, big deep breath. Nice, big deep breath. Lord, you are beautiful and good. Breathe out and I respond with delight, not duty. Yay, yeah. Thank you for joining us in that.

Speaker 1: 23:27

Yeah, yeah, thank you for yeah. Take that with you into your week too.

Speaker 2: 23:38

Lord, you were beautiful and good and I respond with delight, not duty.

Speaker 1: 23:41

Yeah, what a beautiful thing to use for mind renewal, beautiful. So we have some questions that we want you to ponder a little bit, and we're going to visit about some of these questions for a minute too. How can you shift in your life from duty to delight when it comes to your everyday choices? Maybe it's with food, eating and movement, maybe it's with worship, maybe it's with spending or not spending, or time management. Does something come to your mind? Yes, yeah.

Speaker 2: 24:15

What comes to your mind there's two things that come to my mind immediately, and if I'm not engaging in these two things each day, I'm going to have problems, because it's so easy for me to get distracted.

Speaker 2: 24:28

I get so distracted with the world, with all the information coming at me, with my health problems, with my schedule, my kids, I mean there are so many distractions, but if I can hang on to these two things, the first one is praise, so that, of course, comes back to what we just talked about who is God, who is he really? And if I'm engaging and praising him for who he is every single day, I'm going to be focused on him.

Speaker 2: 25:04

My mind will be fixed on him, I will have my heart turned and soft toward him and that's really going to help me to delight in my everyday choices. It lifts my burdens off of my shoulders. He's the one in charge. It's all about him. There's relief that pressure goes away. For me, praise is powerful, and it's one of the things that he talks about in his word. That is important to do. Something happens to us inside, spiritually, when we praise him, and he designed it that way, whether it's with music or without.

Speaker 2: 25:42

And I love praise music as well. So praise, god, you are God, you are my redeemer God, you are my strength. God, you are the God. You are my redeemer God. You are my strength God, you are the one who makes things. So, god, you are my protector. So praise. Praise is powerful, not in our power, but in God's power, yes.

Speaker 2: 26:04

The second thing is gratitude, and we're doing a whole month of gratitude in our revelation within community and Heidi and I have been smiling so much our cheeks hurt. Yes, it's true. Yes, it's true because I know and I see this in my life and other people's lives when I am engaged in gratitude, everything feels different and I am delighting in God because of what he has so generously given me. Even in the worst of circumstances, he is blessing me constantly and if I can put on my gratitude glasses and I can see, of course, I invite God in to show me. If I'm engaged in gratitude, wow, that shifts my whole day. It shifts my viewpoint again from me, me, me, it's all about me, woe is me, I'm not getting enough, or whatever. It is my whole mindset, my whole day is shifted into a focus on God and what he has so generously given me.

Speaker 2: 27:16

And all of a sudden, my eyes are open to every blessing or many of them, I'm sure I don't see them all, but those are the two big ones for me that jump out right away.

Speaker 1: 27:27

Yeah, I would say the same. And for those that might be wondering, well, what's the difference between praise and thanksgiving, or praise and gratitude? And to me, simply enough. Praise is recognizing God's attributes, what is he like and what does he do for people on a large scale. But gratitude can be in the minutiae, like what has he given to me? Gratitude can be in the minutia, like what has he given to me, what has he done in my life and how does he show up in my life, so that's and that's one way anybody could shift from a perspective of duty.

Speaker 1: 27:59

I must do this, I must eat this way, or must move my body that way, or must save money, or whatever it might be. To delight is by focusing on the Lord, who he is, what he says and does, and all that. So that's our first question how can you shift from duty to delight in your everyday choices? Give that a try and see if it doesn't impact you profoundly.

Speaker 2: 28:26

Yes and it will. It absolutely will, Okay. Our second question is what motives need to be surrendered so that delight becomes your default?

Speaker 1: 28:38

Yeah, that's a really good question. What people think of me has got to be surrendered. That's a motive that has an impact on me anyway far too often, and and it ends up feeling brutal when I have that as a motive.

Speaker 2: 28:54

I need. I know, for me, I, for pretty much my whole adult life I have felt this pressure to just do everything perfectly, to be amazing. You know, and I'm just not. Nobody is nobody's amazing. I'm not without the strength and provision of God. And so for me to be able to lay that down and say I do not have to be amazing, I can have a C plus day, I can have an F moment. I don't have to be A plus B plus all the time. That's not from God.

Speaker 1: 29:30

No, no, and really it's very much connected to what will people think of me?

Speaker 2: 29:35

at least for me, it is yes definitely, and there's just a tremendous pressure there that so many of us put on ourselves and then we're so disappointed all the time because we can't seem to make the mark. But if we let go of that, if we surrender that and say, god, this is all you, what do you want to do in me today? You know, what do you need me for and what can I let go of that you don't need? Me for today.

Speaker 2: 30:06

You know if we can surrender that that helps us so much to delight in the Lord and helps that delight become a default. It's there, it's just for sure. It's going to come when we surrender that pressure.

Speaker 1: 30:22

And it's just striking me as you're talking, christina, that with this constant pressure that I feel, if I have the view of God that I'm always letting him down or he can be let down by me or he's disappointed with me, it's no wonder I can't imagine living my life in any way related to delighting in the Lord. Who would delight in a God like that? I mean I could never delight in a God that, if that's the way I view him. I mean I could never delight in a God that, if that's the way I view him. Yeah, I'd be more, if anything, afraid of him, but probably not even that, just resentful, yeah. So having a right view of God is going to shift.

Speaker 2: 31:02

I think all of this completely.

Speaker 1: 31:11

The third question you might want to consider is what area of your life eating included, maybe movement included could become a form, an act of worship in your life. And I know for me, definitely, the eating and the moving and the just well, how I spend, how I don't spend, those are all aspects of my life that can be honoring to God or not. I could do it from a position of delight or a position of duty, and really I'd much rather do it from delight. How about you, christina?

Speaker 2: 31:40

Yeah, you know, I'm in a season right now, a season with my health, where I'm having to not eat a lot of things that.

Speaker 2: 31:51

I'm used to eating because of the way my body is responding. I don't know that it will be forever. I don't think it will be, but for this season I really do feel like very strongly, because of physical things that are happening in my body, that God is calling me away from a lot of the foods that I've eaten my whole life, and that's hard, that's frustrating and difficult. So how can I look at that in a way that it's worship, not restriction? You know I grew up and spent decades dieting and restricting, but this isn't that. This is being called away for a season from foods that make me feel physically bad.

Speaker 2: 32:39

And if I can renew my mind about this and I can say, lord, I want to worship you, I want to do what you're asking of me. I want to submit this and surrender these foods to you for however long you ask, it becomes worship. I can do it. I can be motivated to do it because I'm doing it as worship, not because there's a list somewhere. Somebody said you should do this, you have to do this Some kind of a diet or restriction but because God has asked it of me and he's blessing my body as I choose these other foods right now. That's pretty amazing to me in my life of having been stuck in dieting mentality for so long. I still struggle. I mean, I have to renew my mind about this often, really daily, but I love the idea of worshiping God with the way that I eat and drink.

Speaker 1: 33:43

Second, samuel, 24, 24, david said I will not offer burned offerings to the Lord, my God, that cost me nothing. And so really, what you're talking about, christina, and what many of us might refer to, is there are choices that are costly, choices that are done out of delight, not duty. I delight in who God is, and so if he asks this of me, even though it's something that I value, I can lay it down, because I know he sees it as an offering and it's precious to him. So I think that's kind of an important thing to consider. Absolutely so. Your body, your eating, my body, my eating, are moment by moment choices. They aren't supposed to be burdens to manage. They can be opportunities to reflect his goodness.

Speaker 2: 34:41

Yeah, so we want to let each day be full of small offerings of time, gratitude, presence. You know that carry weight before God, because the fragrant life is the one that reflects him. You know the joyful life is the one that reflects him.

Speaker 1: 35:00

Yeah, I'm so glad we got to talk about these things today.

Speaker 2: 35:06

We are so glad that you've been here today with us. So glad and we hope that you found something here that might really help you. We would love to invite you to come to our next podcast episode here at Revelation Within On the go. We will see you next time. Bye for now, bye, bye-bye.