SPEAKER_00 0:02

Hi, and welcome to our podcast Revelation Within on the Go. I am Heidi Miles MaEperson, one of your hosts, and the owner and lead coach of the RevelationWithin.org ministry.

SPEAKER_01 0:15

And I'm Christina Balina, your other host, also a Revelation Within coach, and Heidi's partner in all things Revelation Within. And we are so happy to invite you to join us for this episode of Revelation Within. Yay! Yay, come on in, put your feet up, take your hair down. Let your hair down, just chill. Sit with us for a few minutes.

SPEAKER_00 0:48

Yeah. Okay, so here we go. Have you ever noticed how you can be doing all the right things? All the right things, and still feel stuck. Yes. Yeah, you have, huh? Yes. I know because you're lazy. Well, you're trying, you're aware, and you even know the truth. Maybe you've renewed your mind the bazillion trillion, 900 million times, but something underneath keeps pulling you back or pulling you down. Doesn't that sound like a fun topic?

SPEAKER_01 1:23

Not so much. It does sound really important, actually. Yeah, it does.

SPEAKER_00 1:30

And it can feel confusing because you think, I don't believe lies, I know better. I I renew my mind. I know God and His truth. And but what if, just what if, and this isn't one of those good fun what ifs, but what if there are beliefs shaping your life that you've never actually named or recognized or acknowledged, even. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:54

Well, that's why I think this is so important because this is something you and I, Heidi, we've been working on for years and years.

SPEAKER_00 2:02

You know.

Naming Hidden Agreements

SPEAKER_01 2:03

Um, and sometimes, wow, it really changes everything, doesn't it? Everything. Everything. So we're gonna call those hidden agreements, the ones where we don't know about them, you know, it's like, is there something there? What am I believing? So we're not talking about the loud, obvious lies, because you know, we've worked on those. Maybe you think, yeah, I've figured those out already. But we're talking about the quiet ones that sound like this is just how I am. I'll probably always struggle with this. And you know what? My body can't be trusted. I need to stay in control, or everything will fall apart. That sounds true. That does sound true, actually, right now. Um, but you know, they don't always feel like lies. You know what they feel like? They actually feel like truth.

SPEAKER_00 3:08

And the thing about agreements is they don't just sit quietly in your mind. Nope, nope, nope. They shape how you feel, they shape how you respond, or or really how you react. There's a difference between responding and reacting. They also shape what you expect. Like if you're going someplace and what you expect to see there, oh my goodness, those hidden agreements can oftentimes really shift things around, and what you expect and what you think you expect might be very different. They can also uh shape what you believe is possible, and this is really sticky one because with God, all things are possible.

SPEAKER_01 3:54

Yes, right.

SPEAKER_00 3:55

So I don't want anything putting a any kind of monitor or uh restriction on what I believe is possible. I don't I want to be sure I'm on top of is there anything in my life at all that's hindering what I believe is possible? Because I have a God who's the God of impossible.

SPEAKER_01 4:13

Yes, yes, that's true.

SPEAKER_00 4:15

Okay. Here's a verse that kind of takes what we've been talking about and brings it to the forefront and says, aha, this is what's going on. For as he or she thinks in his or her heart, so is he or she. Say that again. For as he thinks in his heart, so is he. That's Proverbs 23:7. Basically, the power of what we believe. It's not just what you say you believe or what I say I believe, but it's what we've come into agreement with in our hearts. That's what's shaping our experience. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:55

Well, and sometimes, you know, those agreements were formed in pain, in repeated failure, in things that people have said to us over the years. I mean, you know, those those things that really stick. Oh my gosh, I can think of them right now, things that people have said to me. We all have things like that where we could go back and say, when I was this age, someone said this, and when that this happened, and in college, and all those kinds of things. Or even things we concluded about ourselves over time, you know, and we never really stopped to question them. We just kept going, and it's kind of like it becomes a part of us.

SPEAKER_00 5:35

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't like that idea.

SPEAKER_01 5:39

No, I don't either. But, you know, unless we kind of look them up, unless we kind of like call them out, we're just gonna keep walking around with those on our backs.

SPEAKER_00 5:50

Yeah. And you know, even as we're talking about this, um, I think there's some things that I have come into agreement with that aren't from God that I'm just now realizing are have saturated a lot of how I operate in the world today and in the ministry that God's given us. And I think something maybe like the way my body looks looks, determines my credibility. Ooh, ooh, and I know a lot of people would believe that they would believe that you uh that there's things that you shouldn't do ministry-wise, if you don't have a perfect appearance. And that's not from God, that's from the pit of hell. But I think in some ways, because of things I've heard people say or they've said to me directly, I think that that's something I've come into agreement with. And I tell you what, it undermines my resolve a lot of the time. I have to battle in my mind when these thoughts come to the forefront. Like, what are you doing talking about this? I mean, all people need to do is have one look at you and they know that you're not walking in victory. And and really the reality is for whatever reason, God has ordained, has allowed whatever you want to call it, for me to be in a situation that is difficult for me to navigate through my um, you know, because of my health. Um, and I know you know what I'm talking about, Christina. So um, anyway, but the the beliefs that I hold, even if they're deep, they can influence my behavior, they can influence my voice, my willingness to show up. Oh my goodness. But somehow I think it's I've got to really spend some time with the Lord on this one, that my body determines my credibility. That's not true. No, but that's I think that's it. I think that's narrowing it down.

Christina On Control And Being Okay

SPEAKER_01 7:49

That's it. Well, and that's very bold and courageous of you to say, Heidi, but isn't that what we've been told our whole lives? That the way we look, it's all about that, really. It's all about the way we look, it's all about our shape and all those things, how much we can do or can't do, or you know, how in shape you are, those kinds of things. I mean, we've been hearing that message for a very long time. It comes up in me too. I mean, it makes sense that we would get stuck there because we have heard those lies for so long. And like you said, that's that's not how God sees us. That's not from the word of God, although some people would say it is. A lot of people would say it is, but it's not, it's not. So thank you for your courage and sharing that. Sure. I think for me, I think that I have a hidden agreement that I have been struggling with a with a long, long time that has to do with staying in control, that has to do with managing things just right, that has to do with being okay all the time. I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm okay. Um, and I think that comes from when I was little, when I was a teenager, my my home was kind of an emotionally chaotic place. It was a place where I never quite knew what would be happening with my mom in particular. And my dad was always trying to kind of keep the peace and calm her down. And so I became the person that said, I'm okay, I'm doing my own thing, I'm out. And I would go and do my own thing. And all the way into, I realized this all the way into, you know, when I started, when I got married and I started having babies, and life was just really challenging there, you know. There, I remember there was an intensity with my my little ones and my work and my marriage, everything felt, you know, pretty overwhelming at one point. And I remember my mom said, and they lived about two hours away from us at the time, and my mom called me and said, Would you like me to come? And this brings tears to my eyes right now because I said no, because I didn't feel safe with her, and I didn't, you know, I felt like I had to be okay all the time, and I had to be okay with her. I'm feeling like that today. Yeah, so anyway, she understood somehow, she didn't get upset, which is amazing. Amazing, yeah, it's amazing, and she didn't say negative, awful things. Um, she was actually very understanding about it, I think back to that time. And you know, my kids are all in their 20s now, so this was a long time ago. But she and she's in heaven, but she said, I have an idea. Why don't I write you a check for a babysitter?

SPEAKER_00 11:00

Wow, that's my love language. When I was a young mom, that was my love language. You care for my kids and pray for me, and I will feel doubly loved.

SPEAKER_01 11:09

Well, this this was not like her. That is that was not like her to offer something like that. It was a God moment. She was recognizing what I needed. I needed a break. And she.

SPEAKER_00 11:26

Yeah, it's okay, sweetie. It's good to remember these things, even if it is in front of all our podcast listeners.

SPEAKER_01 11:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:37

Well, and somebody somebody in podcast land needs to hear this and remember something that their mom did, and it might just be even be me.

SPEAKER_01 11:47

Well, and I miss her, you know. I miss her, even with all the emotional craziness. She was an amazing, brilliant woman, and I miss her. Yes. Anyway, um, yeah, so she sent money basically at the time we wrote checks. We don't do that anymore. But anyway, I know, makes me sound so old. But she sent me a check, and I was able to use one of my favorite babysitters probably like five different times for a couple hours each and have a break. And I would take my littlest one, uh, my little baby at the time, with me. And then because she was so little, I was nursing her, and you know, it was just would have been too stressful to leave her at that time. And then I left my two-year-old with the babysitter, and it was glorious, it was just what I needed. Yeah, but I was so I was so stuck that I wasn't able to say, I'm not okay. Yeah, I wasn't able to say, I really need some help. I'm totally overwhelmed.

SPEAKER_00 12:56

Yeah, yeah. If you're listening today, and and I mean, it let God come to you in this moment and and give you an encouraging word. Maybe it's you need to ask for help. It's okay. It's not just okay, it's right where he has you, perhaps. Oh my goodness. I was spoiled, to be honest with you. Um, my kids is dad, and well, he had a mom that was amazing.

SPEAKER_02 13:24

I'm so glad, Heidi.

SPEAKER_00 13:27

Yeah, so it was such a break for me. But you know, isn't it funny how we can have these thoughts that we never actually question the thought, where it came from, the validity of it. Is it from God? How much of my life is structured with that as a foundation?

SPEAKER_01 13:45

Right.

SPEAKER_00 13:47

Oh my goodness.

Freedom Through Awareness And Truth

SPEAKER_01 13:48

So much of what we do here at Revelation Within, and Heidi, what I've done with you for like 12 years is to actually feel the feelings and look at these things and think about them and pray about them and invite God in. And that's not something I was doing before. I mean, I was going to church and Bible study and small group and all those things, but I wasn't, I wasn't looking for hidden agreements, absolutely not. I wasn't renewing my mind in a way that, you know, would make a real difference in my life. I didn't know how to do it. I mean, these are all things that are fairly new in my lifeline, you know, really just 12 years. Um, and before I was just go, go, go. You're okay, just keep going. Just go. Um, that's how I always was, always. And so it is a big shift for me. And sometimes I still just want to go.

SPEAKER_00 14:52

Yeah. Well, and sometimes, I mean, we do, we need to just kind of make an appointment if we have to go to those lengths, to feel with the Lord, invite him in and feel and ask him, what agreements are there that are hidden that are having a foundational impact on my life, where I am making decisions from those hidden agreements, or I'm making assumptions from those hidden agreements. I know, I know I definitely need to revisit this topic, you know, one-on-one time with the Lord and feel what I feel. Here's what's so important, and we really want to believe this. It's true. We don't have to try harder to change our behavior. If there's an agreement underneath that's still in place, that's the place to go. Our lives will always move in the direction of what we believe is true. We teach this all the time that the more we think something, the more we will believe it, and our beliefs will motivate our behaviors, our actions. And that's how lives are built. And so we really want to be proactive about telling ourselves the truth, but also inviting God to scrutiny, search me, oh God, and know my heart and try me and see if there is any way in me that needs to be exposed and lead me in the way everlasting. Our lives will always move in the direction of what we believe is true.

SPEAKER_01 16:19

And sometimes that's so true, so so true. And it's it's amazing to me how when we find that or when God shows it to us, it's like, wait a minute, this is gonna change my relationships. This is gonna change the way I approach this work situation or whatever. It's like, or the way I approach my kids, or you know, I mean, it really affects us in a deep way. We think, oh, it's not such a big deal, you know, I'll get there later. I mean, it's just too much work to figure out what that is or whatever. But it's it's so worth it. It's so worth it.

SPEAKER_00 16:58

Yeah, it really is. Thanks for that. You know, 2 Corinthians 10 5. I love this verse, and we use it a lot in our ministry. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God and take every thought captive to obey Christ. You know, this verse isn't just about catching random thoughts, that can be a part of it too, of course, but it's about identifying the arguments. Think about it for a minute. Are there arguments inside of you that rise up in certain times and and kind of fuss against the you know what God has to say, against what Jesus wants for you? These arguments are deeply rooted ways of thinking. They may or may not have somebody else's voice attached to them, but what matters is that we've embraced them. We want to bring these thoughts into alignment with truth and stand with the Lord. And it's not anything to feel condemnation about or shame. It actually is an invitation to freedom. It's an invitation to freedom that we don't often talk about in our world. We really don't. It's a different kind of invitation because it has to do with what I've glommed onto, what I've grabbed a hold of as being an agreement that establishes everything I do in my life sometimes. I mean, it's like I want to be free from that, I want to shake it off.

SPEAKER_01 18:28

Well, it's actually a way to step out of shame, it's actually a way to step into freedom. And that's one of the reasons that it's so worth it to go here and to do this important work. You know, sometimes the first step isn't replacing the thought either. I mean, sometimes that's like too far down the road. Sometimes the first step is simply seeing it, just being aware. It's like, oh my gosh, this has been there for so long, I didn't even realize I've never really dealt with this. You want to name it. And most importantly, you want to let God shine light on it. Or like we always say, invite them in, invite them in. Yeah. And sometimes that is done best with another person. Sometimes, if it's too big, if it's too deep, if you feel like I don't even know where to begin, and if I fall apart, I won't be able to do the rest of my day or whatever it is. You know, you might need to have a trusted friend with you, but always inviting God in, always. So here's my favorite psalm. Here's a part of it, Psalm 139, verses 23 and 24. Search me, oh God. This this is a prayer that we can use. Search me, oh God, and know my heart. Try me and know my thoughts and see if there be any grievous way in me and lead me in the way of everlasting. That is the perfect invitation, inviting God in. It's also so tender, isn't it? The tone. It's so tender and beautiful. It's not fix yourself, you know, figure it out, pull yourself up, make your list, make your plan, get going. But let me show you what's there.

A Simple Practice To Uncover Lies

SPEAKER_00 20:24

That's so sweet and so like our Jesus, isn't it? It is, it is. Well, let's kind of take this inside for a moment. Let's ask. Um, and listener, we're specifically asking you to invite God into this in your life, but just ask him, Lord, is there something I've come into agreement with that isn't true? That isn't true. I've given it a lot of power in my life. Uh or maybe you don't even see the power you've given it yet. Um, it might be something about your body, it might be something about your worth, your ability to change even. And and just as you sit with the Lord in this, notice what comes up. Is there something coming to the surface for you right now? There's no pressure to fix it. That's not the expectation at all. Just awareness. Lord, is there something I've come into agreement with that isn't true? Show me shine your light on it, Lord. And search me, oh God, and know my heart. Try me and know my God. See if there's any grievous way in me that can lead me in the way everlasting.

SPEAKER_01 21:51

Well, and sometimes when that agreement surfaces, it it can feel almost surprising. You know, you might think, oh. What? Wait a minute. I didn't realize I believed that. But that's actually a moment of grace because what's hidden can't be healed. But what's revealed can be transformed. That's where we want to go.

SPEAKER_00 22:15

That's where we want to be. Oh, definitely. And that's where freedom begins. Yes. Not in striving. I mean, we just will not break free and experience freedom, you know, like the wind beneath our wings by striving. That's just it just isn't going to happen. But as we sit in the truth that God has for us and let him love on us, let him help us be that transformed person. He wants to transform us as we renew our minds. Johnny 32 says, You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. It doesn't say the truth you try harder to apply will set you free. Nope. It says, No, the truth you know, you will know the truth and it will set you free. Think about that for just a moment. It's deeply known, personally known, and internally known. I often call them targeted truths. God will speak targeted truth to my life. And sometimes it's a conviction. Yeah, it's a we really want to like put a boundary around this. And I don't like that. I want any boundaries. No, I it that's not necessarily true. But but the truth does set me free. Everything God leads me into, He does so with love. I mean, He loves me so much that He gave Jesus. Yes. It's just amazing to me.

SPEAKER_01 23:46

Well, and that often starts with breaking agreement with a lie and coming into agreement with what God says instead. I mean, that's that's the truth that we want to stand on. We want to let go of these old lies and thoughts. You know, they've been bringing us down for a long, long time. We want to step into freedom and out of shame and come into agreement and say, God, this is this is the truth. This is what I want to think. This is what I want to live.

SPEAKER_00 24:19

Yeah. So, listener, and we can do it too, of course. Yeah, here's something simple that you can try this week when you notice a repeated struggle or a pattern, um, something that you it's familiar. It's like, ah, I've seen this before in my life. Um just invite God in and ask him, what would I have to believe for this to make sense? And that can uncover hidden agreements really quickly. So, again, when you notice something going on in your life, you making a choice or or you saying things or acting a certain way, whatever repeated struggle or pattern emerges, just ask the Lord um to show you what I would have to be believing in order for this to make sense, and then invite him to show you is there a hidden agreement that you can expose through this? Ooh, that'll be good.

SPEAKER_01 25:17

I'd love to hear from people. Well, and then gently bring that belief to God and ask him, Lord, is this true? Is this true from his perspective? And let him meet you right there.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

Yes. And he had he when he does that, he does that with gentleness and love. It's not like this big stick and this disapproving glare. No, no, no, no, no, no, nothing like that. Listener, we just want to say to you, you're not stuck if you feel like you're always failing. You're not stuck, you may simply be living from an agreement. It may be as simple as inviting God to shine his light on it, show you what it is, and God will lovingly undo it, and you can break agreement with that. Yes.

You Are Not Alone Closing Invite

SPEAKER_01 26:11

Well, and you know, you don't have to dig it up all on your own. You don't have to do this on your own. It's not like, okay, I'm gonna set aside a whole weekend and and sit down and figure this whole thing out. I'm gonna climb up to the top of a mountain. You don't have to. I mean, God is so good at revealing what you're ready to see, and he is gentle and kind and compassionate, and he knows why it hurts so much and where it came from. He knows. He knows, and he knows, and it it happens in a way that leads to freedom, not shame. You will love that. If you've never done this before, you will love that. It is so worth it.

SPEAKER_00 26:56

And we would really love to hear how God moves in your life if you do this activity or any of the other ones that we talk about. Um something surfaced for you today. Just would you just let us know? We'd love to hear what you're noticing. Um, each time the emails go out each week, there's a little link that lets you quote, text us. It ends up uh someplace that we can see it, but I don't know where that is. Oh, I've got a message from somebody, and I I don't anyway, I can't respond or anything, but it's really fun to hear what God is speaking to your heart and how he's moving in your life. Yes, you are not alone in this process, not at all.

SPEAKER_01 27:38

No, you're not alone at all. And we are so glad that you've been here today. Um, and we would love to invite you to join us for our next podcast of Revelation Within.