Welcome And Series Recap

SPEAKER_03 0:02

Hi, and welcome to our podcast, Revelation Within on the Go. I'm Heidi Miles McEfferson, one of your hosts and the owner and lead coach of the Revelation Within.

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And I'm Christina Buckley, your other host, also Revelation Within coach, and Heidi Parker, and all things Revelation Within. We're so happy to invite you to join us for this episode of Revelation Within.

SPEAKER_03 0:35

Well, we have been on a journey together over these past few episodes. Yes. Have are just joining us. You want it, might want to back up and go check out the first three because we're on number four right now. Yes. Um, and it's our final one on living embodied. But before we move forward today, we want to take a moment and look back because it really matters, it really does. It does. In episode one, that we had to start with what scripture has to say. We saw clearly in scripture that living embodied is God's design embodied. Yes, I'm saying embodied. Yes, yes, yes. That's not a trend, it's not a technique, it's something woven into creation itself by God our King. And we saw that the Lord has created us as integrated beings, body and spirit. Body and spirit. Our bodies are part of our worship. Jesus himself lived fully embodied. And even in the resurrection, the body is not discarded but redeemed.

SPEAKER_02 1:40

Yes, redeemed. Okay, and then in episode two, we name the reality that most of us have learned to live disembodied or disassociated, or, you know, kind of needing to numb and pull away from our feelings and just not being present. Not because we failed, no, not at all, but because we have adapted. We've learned to push through, let's go, we can do it. We've learned to disconnect. I don't even know my own name. No, we've learned to numb where it's just too hard to feel those feelings. And we've learned to override as well. And that's Heidi and I speak from our own experience. And for many of us, that has helped us to survive, which makes sense. It's understandable. We understand we're we're in it with you. We get this.

unknown 2:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:39

And the tricky part is as we learn to survive and it works by being disconnected from ourselves, disembodied, if you will, that's kind of a feedback loop that reinforces our tendency to practice those behaviors. Yeah. What we don't realize is that it's sucking us of everything good, everything that's life-giving. Yeah. Right. Right. So then in episode three, we saw why this matters so much. When we live disconnected, we don't stop having needs. We just lose awareness of them. And when we lose awareness, we often turn to counterfeit comforts to try to meet needs we don't even fully understand. There's an emptiness, there's an ache, and I don't know what it is, but I'm just going to throw food or distraction or whatever into that hole in my own heart. Or we may, there's one other aspect to this, we may end up trying to get ourselves to feel again in a good way by going more extreme lengths. We don't want to do that either. It usually leads nowhere good, really.

SPEAKER_02 3:49

Yeah. Well, and I mean, really, when I think about so many of the women over the years that have come, and a few men, but the women over the years that have come to Revelation Within, and we start talking about some of these things, and they say, I have no idea why I eat so much. I don't know. I don't know what's going on. I've never even considered it. Like I just thought it was a bad habit, or like there's actually something behind this. Oh, wow. And then we go deeper. And you know, they're wondering why we aren't giving them a list of eat this and eat this then and when and now this, and here's your plan, and here you go. Because it goes so much deeper, and we don't, we don't even know. We're not even aware. We're just living that way. And many of us have for years.

SPEAKER_03 4:44

Yeah. I think we all probably know the person who, no matter what's going on in her life or his, sometimes it's it's a guy. Uh, a lot of times it might be a guy. Um, you might even be married to one. Yeah. Where how are you doing today? Because it's always, I'm good, I'm good. There's nothing wrong. It's all good. It's all good. Or maybe you you are the one that says that it's all good. Yeah. Well, is it? And and if it's not, why say it is all good? Are you telling yourself that? Like Christina, you said you just tried to convince yourself.

SPEAKER_02 5:22

Yeah. Convincing, yeah. And I've worked really hard at that in certain seasons of my life. It's like, uh, you know, I'm I'm fine, I'm good, I can handle this, you know. I've I've got it. And it's like, why do we do that to ourselves? Um, not that we're gonna tell everybody how we're feeling. No, of course not. But we need to have those safe people in our lives to be able to share with. And of course, God, He loves us so much. He knows, He sees the trials before they hit us. He sees them like big, giant ocean waves. You know, he's like, oh, here comes a big one. I mean, he knows, he knows, but he loves us and he's so ready to engage with us. He's so ready. So now the question becomes what does it actually look like to live differently? And we want to

When Life Feels Impossible

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dive into this today. Not theoretically, not in a quiet moment, but in the middle of real life, those big ocean waves that that hit us and knock us over. And then we're in what I used to call the washing machine where you're going around and around in circles and you don't know which way is up and which way is down, and you're trying trying to catch your breath. Right. So let's just be honest. This is not hard when you're calm, when you're rested, when all your ducks are sitting in a row. I can't even find my ducks recently. Yeah, or with when you're sitting with your Bible open and there's a candle lit, or you're at a retreat. Have you ever felt like that? You go to a retreat and you leave and you're like, oh no, like I left it all there somehow, you know. But this is this is hard when you're overwhelmed, when you're triggered, when you're exhausted, when you're facing the same pattern again and again and again, when life feels impossible. You've heard Heidi and I in other podcasts talk about impossible days. And when those start piling up, you just want to hide. I mean, that makes so much sense. This is where embodied living either becomes real or it just stays like an idea, a thought. Oh, yeah, well, okay, whatever. But we want, let's get into the real stuff because we do want to live a life full of color and life, right? We don't want to live a black and white life.

SPEAKER_03 8:08

We want to live a life in color for sure. Um, so let's turn to the scriptures, of course. We love starting there. Yeah, Psalm 46, verse 1 says, God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Um, I I love this because it states very clearly, God is my refuge where I hide and where I can go to be protected. And he's also my strength, and he's also my help. This is a great one for a godless and praise fest for sure. Yeah, this is not after the moment passes, this is in the moment. You gotta love it. What we're talking about in this week in our episode is a shift from living on autopilot, you know, which many of us do, to living awake with the Lord, living awake with God, because disembodied living is often automatic. It kind of floats over the real thing and doesn't really set down any kind of roots or awareness or stop for a minute. It bypasses awareness, it jumps straight to reaction.

SPEAKER_02 9:22

Wow, that is exactly what it does. You nailed it, Heidi. Um, Ephesians 5, 15 and 16. Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise, but as wise, making the best use of the time. Look carefully. I mean, that's awareness, that's intentionality, that's embodied living. You're present, you're there, your heart is there, your soul is there, your mind is there, you're looking carefully. That's that's where we want to go. So let's go into some real scenarios.

Autopilot Reactions And Hidden Needs

SPEAKER_02 10:04

Okay, so this is gonna be really easy for Heidi and I to do because we've been really struggling lately with some big things. So, okay, let's say you feel overwhelmed, and before you even think, you reach for food. Okay, yeah, that's easy, right? I'm like, duh. No, I'm just I can imagine that. Yeah, yeah. That was just a couple days ago for me. Um, here's another one. You feel anxious and you immediately distract yourself. Immediately. Yeah, I mean, I can relate to that easily.

SPEAKER_03 10:41

And you know what's so tricky about that one, I think, is you're anxious and then you distract yourself. And what you distract yourself with may not just be scrolling or um binge watching shows, it might be church work, it might be ministry work, it might be cleaning your house. Anything and everything can be used to distract yourself, which adds to the disembodied thing that we've been talking about. And we have to just be mindful of the fact okay, am I doing this because it needs doing right now? Am I doing this because I want to do it? Or am I doing this because I'm running from something else that I don't want to do? Um, it's kind of a tricky one because it's so easy to justify staying busy in our society. People are praised for how busy they are. I remember when I was a mom of young kids, we homeschooled, yeah, and I helped out at church and did all this different stuff. And people would say, I don't know how you do all you do. I'm like, Yes, I'm amazing. But you know, the truth is I had a lot I was running from not feeling a lot I didn't want to experience. So all of those things I could get praised for and not have to pay the piper when it came to being disembodied or distracted in some way.

SPEAKER_02 12:00

Right, right. Um, here's another one. You feel pressure, and so you go into overdrive. Um, and afterwards you think, why did I do that? Right? I mean, how many of you how I I know that I have felt this so many times where it's like, oh my gosh, I just wish I could rewind, you know, and try that again. Why did I do that? I didn't really want to do that. The answer is not because you lack discipline. Shape up. Yeah, or self-control or whatever you want to call it. That's that's not what this is. You weren't present, or I wasn't present to what was happening inside of you or inside of me. We weren't present, we were somewhere else. It's like when you're eating and eating, eating and eating and eating, and you don't even know you're doing it. It's like you're not even present with your body. Right. I gotcha.

SPEAKER_03 13:02

Really, this is so important. The invitation isn't to control yourself, get it together. It's not like that. We're not replacing one form of control with another. We're not saying pay closer attention so you can behave better. No, no, no, no. You're saying pay attention so you can walk with God and what is real, and we're saying it to ourselves and to each other, too. Christina, pay attention so you can walk with God and what is it?

SPEAKER_02 13:29

What was that real? What did you just say something? Sorry, I was distracted.

SPEAKER_01 13:41

I missed it. I missed it, and what you said was so good, but I missed it. I was distracted.

SPEAKER_03 13:48

Well, for that, we're gonna go to scripture. Okay, Psalm 25, 14 says the friendship of the Lord is for those who fear him. Friendship with the Lord requires presence, it requires awareness, it requires being there. How about that?

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What do you think?

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I love that God calls us friend, it makes it so um so much easier for me to understand our relationship when he calls me friend.

SPEAKER_03 14:20

It makes me want to sing that song. I am a friend of God. Yeah, I am a friend of I don't know anything. He calls me friend, yeah. That's all I know of it.

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But no, it's true. I feel like I have such a deeper understanding of our relationship, me and God. If we can call it a friendship, you know, that's just so sweet, so intimate. I love that. Wow, okay. So we have some practical steps for you to help you with this. And let's see how it goes. Okay.

Create Space And Name Reality

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First practical step create space in the first moment. The first moment when something's happening. Okay, so when something is triggered in you, your instinct will be to move quickly, to react. Oh my gosh, something just happened. I need to react, I need to fix, I need to reach for relief. But embodied living begins with something simple and powerful, creating space in that very first moment, even for just a few seconds.

SPEAKER_03 15:31

So I'm gonna just jump in here real quick. Sorry about that. No, dude. Um, I'm just thinking that um I in my experience that I mentioned previously, where I had just gotten an email from my sister telling me her very challenging news. Yes, I reacted. I I want the world to go away, I want everything I'm clocking out. That's that. Don't bother, nobody should bother me. I didn't want anything to I didn't want to have to deal with anything else.

SPEAKER_02 16:03

Right.

SPEAKER_03 16:03

If I were applying this step, I would take a deep breath or something, maybe a breath prayer.

SPEAKER_02 16:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 16:10

Some other mind renewal tool, or maybe opening the word that's not likely to happen when I feel the way I did. But I can take some breaths and just create space and recognize okay, this is what's going on. And rather than just catering to it, which is exactly what I did, just take a few seconds and invite, if I can, invite God into it. And why wouldn't I want to? Because I mean, he's good and he's sovereign and he knows what I'm gonna need both now and going forward. So I think this is a I know this is a great look and learn opportunity for me. Yeah, when I've been met with yet another difficult thing to process or to to be present for. I want to get some space from my reactivity and instead open my heart to taking a space right there. Just take a space, invite God into it.

SPEAKER_02 17:06

Right, exactly. So creating space in the first moment, it's not about shutting down what you feel then. It's not suppression, it's not like, okay, I'm just gonna be strong. No, no, no. It's about not immediately acting on what you feel, just having a little pause. I think of this sometimes when I get a text too. You know, we're we're so used to responding immediately to everything, right? Our communication these days, there's no wait time. Like it used to be, you'd have to wait for a telegram or a letter in the mail or something, right?

SPEAKER_03 17:44

But these I'm so glad to be out of that season of waiting for a telegram because it's gonna be a long wait. What about the Pony Express? I gotcha though. I mean, things have changed. Everything, every you know, it's like it's faster, it's more, it's quicker. It's let's do this.

SPEAKER_02 18:07

All the time. Our life is like we we're living microwave life. Yeah, instant coffee. Instant, fast, hurry up. And so for a long time, when I got a text from somebody, I felt like I need to respond right away. Well, no, I don't. I can take a minute, I can breathe, I can think about it, I can set it aside, or you know, whatever I need to do, I can bring it to the Lord, especially a text that might be challenging. And it's like, okay, so if I can practice that little pause, that's gonna help me so much. Because when we react instantly, we move from trigger to action without any awareness at all. I mean, how many times have you done that? I've done that so many times.

SPEAKER_03 18:57

I've only done it once.

SPEAKER_02 19:00

What? That's amazing, Heidi. From trigger to action without any awareness or wisdom from the Lord or anything, we just go. We just go, we just jump in without knowing what we're even jumping into. Ecclesiastes 7 9. Be not quick in your spirit to become angry. So this is not don't feel, this is don't let the first impulse lead. Wow. So, what does this space create? This little small pause, what does this create? It creates room for awareness. What is happening in me right now? It creates room for truth. What is actually real right now? And it also creates a space for God's presence. Lord, meet me here in this, in this moment. So let's do a little bit of simple practice. Something happens and then you pause. Take one breath, stay present. Even five seconds changes everything. You're not holding yourself back, you're holding space open for God to meet you in what is real. I mean, that sounds really good. That sounds doable to me. That pause.

SPEAKER_03 20:28

All right, practical step number two: locate yourself or name what is real. Once you've created that little bit of space, or once I have, the next step is to locate yourself honestly. Ask the Lord what is actually happening in me right now. Not what should be happening, not what I wish was happening, but what is true. And this may at first feel really unfamiliar because many of us have spent years overriding, minimizing, overreacting. Or sometimes we've spent years ignoring what is happening inside of us. So actually calling it up and naming it, what it is. Naming what is real is not the same as being self-absorbed or self-focused.

SPEAKER_02 21:16

Right, right.

SPEAKER_03 21:17

It is truth telling. Yeah, yes, truth telling. Lamentations 340 says, let us test and examine our ways and return to the Lord. Notice the order here. It's the scripture is actually encouraging us to test and examine our ways. So the first thing we're gonna do is examine our ways and then return. We cannot return to God with what we refuse to acknowledge. And this matters because if we misidentify what's happening, we will misdirect our response. We will go off half cocked. Right. Um, yes, yeah. For example, if we call overwhelm hunger, if we call Loneliness boredom, if we call pressure a lack of discipline, we will respond all to the wrong problems. Oh, that's so good, Heidi.

SPEAKER_01 22:10

Yeah. I can think of so many times that I've done that. So many.

SPEAKER_03 22:15

Me too. But if we use simple language like I feel anxious or I feel tired or I feel disconnected, and just use that language. No fixing, no judging, just naming. Makes all the difference in the world. What do we feel? Just let's name it. We're not becoming too aware. It's hard to do that, I think. We are becoming honest about our inner world with God.

SPEAKER_02 22:45

Yeah, wow. So good. Okay, here comes practical step number three. Invite God into the moment, not after. Not after. I mean, after is fine too, but it's so, so good to invite him in right in the middle of everything. This is where things shift. Most of us have learned to go to God after we fix it, after we calm down, after we somehow get it together or think that we did. But embodied living invites God in right in the middle of the moment, not polished,

Invite God And Choose Truth

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not composed, just real. Hebrews 4.16 says, let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Not after the need passes. It doesn't say receive mercy and find grace later after you've pulled it together. No, right there in the moment of the need. So in this way, instead of being triggered, which leads to self-reliance, we begin to live with this trigger that leads to connection. Oh, don't you love that idea? I love it. I love it so much. We talk so much in Revelation Within about God's invitation to us and how He invites us with love and joy, how He invites us with His warmth and gentleness. That's what this is the friendship of us with God. You begin to live from trigger to connection. So let's practice just for a minute here, right there quietly. Lord, this is what's happening. And then help me here. And then show me what is true. You're not interrupting God with your need. He's got all the time in the world. In fact, your name is on every line of his calendar today. It really is. You are responding to his invitation to come close. Oh, I love that so much. I do too. Thank you, Lord.

SPEAKER_03 25:05

Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord. So, by way of review, before we go on with the next couple of steps, we just want to remind you of what the first three steps are. Practical step number one is creating space in that first moment. You know, take a breath. Um, don't be quick. Practical step number two, locate yourself. Name what is real. I think locate yourself is kind of a weird way of putting it. Anyway, name what is real. That's going to, you know, ask God to tell you what is real. What am I needing? What is happening right now? Um, and then number three is invite God into the moment. Yeah, that's a cool thing to do. Absolutely. Every day. In right in the middle of the mess, right in the middle of it. Exactly. Practical step number four, then choose a true response. Maybe not a perfect one, but a response based in truth. Now, from that place of awareness, from that place of connection, we choose the next step with intention. It's not based on pressure, it's not based on fear or habit, it's based on the previous steps. What is true? What is aligned? What is spirit-led? And then we can be more intentional with our response. Galatians 5:16 reminds us to walk by the spirit. And in doing so, we won't fulfill the lusts of the flesh. And I would really like to walk with the spirit instead of the other option. Walking implies that it can be step by step, that it can be moment by moment, that it's not all at once. And so, what this might look like, sometimes it's a real small response. Like when I read that email, I could have just closed the lid on my laptop and gone outside for a minute or played with the dog. It might be stepping away, taking a breath, choosing to wait, choosing a different action, or simply staying present instead of escaping. It may not even feel very dramatic, but it is deeply significant. I know it would have been for me if I had, after I read that email, done anything other than what I did do. It would have been very important and good. We're not aiming for a perfect response. We're aiming for a true response, a response that's rooted in and based in truth. It's not about performing better, it is about responding from connection with God instead of reaction.

SPEAKER_02 27:51

That is powerful. Okay, we have one more practical step for you. Number five, return without condemnation. And you know, this this step might be the most important of all. I think this might be. You see what you think. Because you will not do this perfectly, just throw perfection out the window. That's not gonna happen. You will react, you will disconnect, you will fall into old patterns, and in that moment, you will be tempted to think, you know what? Nothing is changing. Not if, but when. We know we're gonna fall. We know we're gonna stumble. The transformation is not that you never fall, the transformation is how quickly you return. Romans 8:1, of course, there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Condemnation says, stay down,

Return Without Condemnation

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but grace says, come back. So here's a simple, simple practice for you. When you notice, pause, acknowledge, return to God. No spiraling, no self-attack. The moment you notice is not failure. It is evidence that you're actually waking up. I love that. Yay! I think that's actually a really important prayer that we could pray, Lord, wake me up, wake me up in this moment.

SPEAKER_03 29:35

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 29:36

Wake me up in the midst of this situation.

SPEAKER_03 29:39

I have been praying that quite a bit. Tell my heart to beat again. Yes. So this becomes our rhythm when we have been triggered, when we feel challenged in some way, take a breath, create space. Second step is to uh identify what is true, locate yourself, what is real. Number three, invite God to come into the situation. Number four, choose a response based in truth. Number five is return to Him, make a choice based in the things that He has shown us. It may not be perfectly, but we can do this consistently. And over time, this is how we will begin to live present, aware, connected, and free. This is where many give up. Not because they've failed, but because they interpret the failure as nothing is changing. That's so true, and that's just a lie. But what if the moment you notice is actually evidence of change?

SPEAKER_02 30:44

Yes, there you go. I love that. So the fact that you're becoming aware means that you are no longer fully asleep to it.

SPEAKER_00 30:52

Yay!

SPEAKER_02 30:53

Yes, that's so good. That's just one step in that direction of waking up. John 16, 13 says, When the spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth. Awareness is actually part of his guidance. Living in bodies is not just about changing behavior, it's about learning to live present with God and bring what is real into the light. Also responding instead of reacting and then returning again and again. And the more we do this, the more we return, especially. I think we just want more and more of it. I do, because God's response is so good and so sweet and so loving.

SPEAKER_03 31:40

The true goal for this, of course, is not perfection, it's not constant awareness that would probably overwhelm us. It's not flawless execution. We want to live embodied, we want to be present with what God has given us in our lives. And um, so really the goal is relationship with Him in real time. Deuteronomy 30, verses 19 and 20 say, I have set before you life and death. Therefore, choose life, loving the Lord your God, obeying his voice, and holding fast to him. Choosing life is not abstract, it happens in moments, moments like what we described today.

SPEAKER_02 32:23

Yeah, and you know, so much of this when I think about my own experience with this, um, and kind of checking out and pretending that everything's okay. For me, so much of it is fear. I'm afraid, you know, I'm afraid to step forward, I'm afraid to deal with something, I'm afraid to be present in it. But God says so many times in the Word, more than the days of a year, do not be afraid. Um, He wants to take care of that for us. I don't want to live in fear. That's it's a hard place to live. It's a scary place to live. So as we close this series, we want to leave you with this. You were never created to live disconnected from your life. You were created to live present, live aware, to live in relationship with God right here in your body, in your actual life.

SPEAKER_03 33:21

You don't have to force a thing, you don't have to fix everything. Right. Just keep coming back to the Lord again and again. It's the life he's already given you. He wants you to attend to it at all. Just be present to him and to what he's given you.

SPEAKER_02 33:39

We are so glad that you've been here today, and we would love to invite you to our next podcast episode of Revelation Within. We'll see you next time.