Welcome And Why This Matters

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Hi, and welcome to our podcast, Revelation Within on the Go. I'm Heidi Filesma Epherson, one of your hosts, and the owner and lead coach of Revelation Within.

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And I'm Christina Buckley, your other host, also a Revelation coach, and Heidi's partner in all things Revelation Within. And we are so happy to invite you to join us for this episode of Revelation Within.

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Welcome, welcome.

SPEAKER_00 0:40

Welcome.

Spirit-Led Eating And Real Temptations

SPEAKER_01 0:42

Well, today's episode, we want to talk a little bit about what it means to be led by the Holy Spirit as we navigate through some of the temptations that we struggle with, specifically with regard to food and eating.

SPEAKER_00 0:56

What have we ever talked about that before? No, never.

SPEAKER_01 1:02

We better talk about it today. Yeah, we better talk about it a little bit. Does food and eating feel kind of peaceful for you? That'd be awesome if it does. That's awesome. Yeah. Or is it kind of complicated? Is it both? Or maybe it's somewhere in between. If it feels any way at all, you are in the right place. Or maybe let's complicate it a little bit.

unknown 1:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:28

Are you being led to get on a GOP1 or to go on some sort of prescriptive diet? Like maybe your doctor wants you to eliminate certain things from your diet. That complicates things for many of us to do this. Whatever your situation, your relationship with food and eating in your body, we want to open our arms wide to you, as always, and invite you to just kind of sift what we say and glean whatever you can that's that's for you from the Lord during our time together today.

When Food Gets Complicated Early

SPEAKER_00 2:03

Yes. Well, Heidi, you mentioned complicated, and that's what has described me for many, many years with food and eating and body image. The word complicated, that's a good word. Um, the complication started for me when I was in my early teens, and I was watching my mom do a lot of overeating, watching her um listening to her talk very negatively about her body. And I love my mom, and I have forgiven her for all of that, and I know she did the best that she could. Right. But I spent years learning from her how to complicate food and eating and body image. I was also raised in the LA area, Los Angeles, Southern California, and I learned a lot of complications with that too, about what I should look like and what pressures should I put on myself every day. And what should I eat, what should I not eat? Um, how much should I over-exercise to try to take care of how much I overeat? Yeah. Very complicated, in some ways simple, actually, but um, you know, and I know so many of you out there can relate, and I know that Heidi can too.

SPEAKER_01 3:21

Oh, yeah. Um yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:22

So for many years, I completely separated my relationship with the Lord with my food and eating. I thought, oh you know what? Yeah, I thought he's got much bigger fish to fry. He has, I don't know where I first heard that, but I've loved it ever since. But he has so much going on in this world, so many difficult things. And I'm over here worried about how many cookies I've eaten in one sitting or whatever. And I just thought, you know what? It's my job to get myself together. It's my job to figure this out. And then when I've got it all put together, I'm gonna go to the Lord and we'll talk about it then. And before then, I just it's not the right thing for me to go to him. I just I really believed that for a long time. But when I look back, I just think, what was I thinking? Um, I knew the Lord, I was walking with the Lord, I was going to church and Bible study, I was leading youth group, I was doing all the things, and yet this issue that was so important to me and that caused me so much angst and hopelessness. Um, I thought, no, I gotta figure this out myself.

SPEAKER_01 4:44

Definitely not an uncommon perspective. In fact, over the years, as Christina and I have both been having an opportunity to interact with hundreds, literally hundreds, if not thousands, of women. We see this is a common phenomenon, that that there's this perspective that God's over there when it comes to the food and eating and body image it deal, that whole deal. He's I'm not inviting him into that. No way. I'm not gonna do that. And and that's really we want to blow that idea out of the water today. If we go anywhere at all, we want to challenge each one of us. Can I really believe in my heart that that's what is the best path? If I want to be at peace, maybe with food and eating in my body, of course. Well, it all, but who is the author of peace? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 5:42

Well,

Distant God Or Disappointed God

SPEAKER_00 5:43

and then, you know, after a while I went to a different extreme, which you kind of mentioned a little bit, which is God is listening and God is interested, but guess what? He's disappointed. Oh yeah, I mean, I really I went there for many years. And I've talked about before how I've written all those, I wrote all those journals um apologizing constantly. I'm sorry, Lord, I'm sorry, Lord. And I was, I was stuck in this awful cycle. I didn't know how to get out. Um, but God was not disappointed in me, he was loving me, he was patient, he was kind. Does God really care about what I'm eating and when does he care about that? Um, he does, and you know why is because I do, and because he made my body, and he knows that this has just been a source of trouble for me and complication. Yeah, so he knows. I mean, yeah, we have spent so much, many of us, time, money, frustration on this issue, and yet we keep it from the Lord for some reason. We think that he's not close if we're messing up. Well, and even not true.

SPEAKER_01 7:07

Yeah, it's not true. The mental bandwidth and the anxiety that has been produced by this area of my life over the years. Anything that causes that intensity of feelings, have I wept over it? Yes. Have I laughed over it? Yes. Have I fallen on the floor and just said I'm not going to whatever event it is because I didn't have anything to fit? Yeah, he cares about all of that. It breaks his heart. He wants us to bring it to him for sure. Um, many of us, when we think about inviting God into our eating, we imagine, okay, if he comes at all, if he accepts my invitation, he's gonna show up with a clipboard, a whistle, and he's gonna jot everything down and inspect everything. What did you eat? How much was it? Were you good today?

SPEAKER_00 8:00

No, that's not that's not who God is. In scripture, we see a very different picture. God is the one who formed us, he knows us, he calls his work wonderful, he calls us his own, he calls us friend, he calls us his beloved daughters and sons. We are not inviting him into unknown territory, not at all. We're actually waking up to his loving presence in a place where we may have learned to hide.

SPEAKER_01 8:33

Yeah, I bet you the listener can relate to that. Can you relate to the idea of hiding your food and eating and body image? It's one thing to not invite them in, but it's another thing to literally try to hide it.

SPEAKER_00 8:48

I mean, yeah, right.

Spirit-Led Eating Is Not A Diet

SPEAKER_01 8:51

Well, in our ministry, we've been referring to spirit-led eating, and I just we just want to kind of circle back to that. Many of you have not heard us talk about that. You can do a search on whatever um podcast listening platform you're on, but um it's not just another way to make food or eating righteous or unrighteous, and it's not a Christianized diet and it's behavior management. It's not that. It's not with a Bible verse slapped onto it. No, no, no, no. It's learning to actually listen to the Holy Spirit's guidance and honor the body that God has given us, cultivating peace and gratitude and freedom in his presence when we can in any given moment of time invite him into the moment and say, Lord, I'm listening. What would you have me do? What would you have me be? What would you have me say? That is the place we want to land. He is good, and he waits to show us compassion. He does not wait to whack us upside the head.

SPEAKER_00 10:01

No, he really, really doesn't you know. For some of us, body signals have not always felt safe. Right. Um, that's a huge issue. Hunger, satisfaction, desire, or fullness may carry memories or fear, even confusion.

SPEAKER_01 10:19

That's definitely the case for me. And I remember this was years ago. I remember where I was at the time, discovering that oh my goodness, the reason I have so much trouble with this approach to food and eating of waiting for hunger and stopping when hung satisfied, um, was because I didn't feel safe when I was hungry. And and it it was just another layer for me to work through. It was because of childhood abuse. And God met me in that place. And I remember it, it wasn't an audible voice, but it could have been and not been any louder. He just pointed out to me, you can rest here when you are hungry. You can rest here. Do you look around and see anybody who will ever abuse you again? No, you are safe, trust me. Yes, and you know, that breakthrough that I had was not merely in waiting to eat, it was recognizing that. Oh my goodness, God is present in this place that had once felt so dangerous and vulnerable.

SPEAKER_00 11:29

That's so good, Heidi. Thank you for sharing that. Sure.

Safety In Hunger And Identity First

SPEAKER_00 11:33

Romans 8 14 says, for those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. So let's notice the order in that verse. We are not led by the Spirit so that we can earn the right to become God's children. We are led because we are his children. So identity comes first. His leading grows out of relationship. And that means we can approach this journey with curiosity instead of accusation. Some of the questions that yeah, that you mentioned, I know it's so good. Oh my goodness. Some of the things that you mentioned, Heidi, too. Lord, what are you showing me? Lord, what do I need right now? And then this is such a great question. I love this question. What would love look like in this moment?

SPEAKER_01 12:27

So we want to kind of clarify up front that Christine and I and Revelation Within won't define for you or for anyone how Holy Spirit-led eating should look. But we know that we want to be led by his spirit in our lives. And those who are led by the Spirit of God are the sons and daughters of God. So it seems like a really good idea.

SPEAKER_00 12:52

So before we go into the five intentions of spirit-led eating, we want to just throw a question out there for you to think about, reflect on a little bit. Is it fair to say that we long to be at peace with food and eating in our bodies? Is that fair to say?

SPEAKER_01 13:10

No, I think so.

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I think so too. I don't think I know a single person that would say, no, that's not it. So the only way that we will be able to do that is by inviting God into our food, eating, body image, all of it. This is the foundation of what we offer here at Revelation Within.

SPEAKER_01 13:33

Yeah, it's inviting God into everything, including food eating and body image and the peace I long for. And it's likely these are the only real things we can assume might be the same about most of us is that we really don't want to have a battle with this anymore.

SPEAKER_00 13:51

Yeah, I think we can agree on that.

SPEAKER_01 13:53

Yeah, when you think about it with how different we each are, we all have different choices in front of us. We have medication choices, food choices, and so much more.

Romans 14 And Different Convictions

SPEAKER_01 14:06

Really, what is really cool though is Romans chapter 14 speaks to this very thing. And I just want to state a disclaimer at the outset. I understand that the Apostle Paul, when he wrote to the Romans, was not talking about whether or not you'd get on the scale or not, or whether or not you would talk about a diet or be on a diet or not, or be an intuitive eater, or whatever. But it does have principles for us. And it was talking about food and eating, actually, but just not in the same context as the culture we're in right now. So if you want to follow along with us, open your Bible to Romans 14 because we will be looking there today. And uh, we're gonna reference a lot of verses in Romans 14. It speaks to the fact that we may land on different choices that are all led by God and that he may want to speak to us about that very thing.

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So for us, one person may eat keto, another may not. One may use a GLP one, another may believe this is not wise for me. One might weigh herself, another may need freedom from the scale. One may track food for medical reasons, say, another might find tracking difficult for them or harmful in some way.

SPEAKER_01 15:30

So just to be clear, gosh, I know I said that already several times. It's never our intention, not at all, to define for you or everybody what the Holy Spirit will lead you to do. We just are agreeing on this common ground, and that is we want peace. Yes. And inviting God into this is likely the only way to experience peace, no matter what else he leads you to do.

SPEAKER_00 15:58

Romans 14:3. The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them. So Paul addresses both directions. The person who feels freedom must not look down on the person with boundaries, and the person with boundaries must not judge the person who exercises freedom. Why? Because God has accepted them.

SPEAKER_01 16:32

I love that he includes that at the very tail end of verse three. God has accepted them. That's so cool.

SPEAKER_00 16:39

That's a seal.

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It is our standing with God isn't determined by whether we eat carbs or not, or follow a particular plan, or abstain from following a plan, or take medication, or abstain from taking medication. Yes, count calories even, or refuse to count anything. That doesn't make us righteous or unrighteous. Why are we accepted? Because we belong to Christ. Yes. And then Romans 14:4 says, Who are you to judge someone else's servant to their own master servants stand or fall? And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand. Again, that's Romans 14:4.

SPEAKER_00 17:23

So each of us is the Lord's servants. None of us answer to Heidi and me or a coach or a diet culture or anyone else for every personal eating or medical decision. We each answer to our master, to our Lord Jesus Christ. And I love Paul's reassurance in verse four. The Lord is able to make them stand. Yay. We can trust him to lead his beloved daughters and sons. Romans 14 tells us in verse 5 that each of them should be fully convinced in their own mind. So, you know, two people might make opposite choices and both sincerely make them to the Lord. Verse 6 in Romans 14 seems to indicate that whatever choice you make, be convinced it is for the Lord and then give thanks to Him.

SPEAKER_01 18:18

Exactly. And really, it's almost like the defining question is not what are you going to eat or what program are you going to be on or abstain from, or will you take medication or not. It's can you bring this choice openly before Jesus, receive his direction, and make that choice with gratitude and faith. I don't know. I think that's a really important question.

SPEAKER_02 18:42

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 18:43

Um, I think a lot of people, and I've done it too, choose what's easy and fun when it comes to this area, and until it's not anymore. And then we choose something else that sounds easy and fun. Um uh but Holy Spirit-led eating may look different from one person to another. It may look different in different seasons of the same person's life, too. We belong to Jesus in every choice, he's the one who makes us stand, and he is the one we answer to.

SPEAKER_00 19:13

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 19:14

So verses seven and eight in Romans 14 say, for none of us live for ourselves alone. If we live, we live for the Lord. So whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. Holy Spirit-led eating is not ultimately a food management project. It really isn't.

SPEAKER_00 19:31

No, it isn't.

SPEAKER_01 19:32

It's an expression of belonging, and it's it's an expression of belonging to who? To a coach, to a program, no, to belonging to the Holy Spirit, to the Lord. Yes. We're not asking Jesus, okay, Lord, this is what I've chosen because it sounds easy. And will you approve it and put your stamp on it saying, yep, it's Jesus approved. Uh, you know, we're not asking Jesus to approve the eating plan we've already chosen. We're bringing our bodies, our desires, our fears, our medical needs, our goals, and food choices under his loving care because we belong to him.

SPEAKER_00 20:13

Yes. So, so good. That that sounds wonderful. Um, for me, a person who has tried all the plans that seemed so easy but never were. But I just I love what you just said, Heidi. Um Romans 14, 12 says each of us will give an account of ourselves to God. Notice. Yeah, Paul says each of us will give an account of ourselves, not everyone else. Okay. And that means that I can ask, Lord, what are you inviting me to do? Let's talk about me, not my neighbor, my coworker, my sister. Let's talk about me, Lord. Am I responding from faith or fear? That's really a good question. So good. What am I responding from a place of is this choice producing greater dependence on you, Lord? Am I treating my body with wisdom and care? Have I quietly made my personal conviction into a rule for everyone?

SPEAKER_01 21:23

Or anyone else but me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:26

I heard someone say something so interesting the other day. We were talking about this very thing, different kinds of choices, what looks kind of shiny and exciting, but then it's not, and how we just so easily sway from one way to another. And then I was talking with someone who had chosen, had committed, had paid for something. And she said, You know what, Christina? I chose the wrong heart.

SPEAKER_01 21:52

Ooh.

SPEAKER_00 21:54

And I said, What? What does that mean? What do you tell me more about that? And she said, I chose something. Something that is really hard in a way in a direction I don't want to go. If God is calling me to something hard, I want to go that direction. Yeah. But I chose something on my own without inviting him in. And it was the wrong hard.

SPEAKER_01 22:17

Oh, wow. That's insight. Yeah. I'd love to know.

SPEAKER_00 22:21

I thought that was fantastic. Wow. I was like, I was writing it down. That was a powerful insight.

SPEAKER_01 22:30

Yeah, definitely. And along those lines, too, consider whether it's somebody else enthusiastically promoting what they're choosing to you, or whether you're enthusiastic and you want to promote it to others. Whatever my personal choices have been, I want to be careful about how evangelistic I am about it. No, I really do because my personal method and my enthusiasm and my quote results might awaken the sense of comparison in them. It might awaken their shame, their fear, even obsession and disordered patterns in somebody else. Whoever is listening, we don't always know what they've struggled with. And realize that something that may be permissible for me that God has invited me to do may yet still be unloving, especially if I'm repeatedly advocating it with others. It may be unloving toward others to say, you should try this. Just recognize, please, that people like us, there are people like us in this population of people who struggle with this counterfeit comfort of overeating or under-eating and over-exercising or under exercising or whatever it might be. We are vulnerable and we don't want to take for granted that somebody isn't gonna fall when they hear what we're doing. We want to be cautious and maybe guard that uh with the Lord.

How Food Talk Can Harm Others

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Ask Him.

SPEAKER_00 24:07

You know, Ken, I just want to throw something in here because I know so many people that do this, and I just want to say this in case somebody needs to hear it out there. If you are visiting a friend or seeing a friend that you haven't seen in a while, and the person has shape shifted in some way, larger, smaller, whatever it is, it doesn't really matter. Um, I just wanna I just want to say that it is damaging to a person to say, oh, look at you, or you know, what's going on? What have you done? What what's happening with you? I'm so proud of you because when we take notice of that with somebody, it's like what you just said, Heidi. That shame just comes right up. And pride, right? That person means well. That person means well, but putting all that attention on somebody for the way their body looks today, and it might look different tomorrow, next month, next week. Um that's gonna bring up most likely that vulnerability that you were just talking about, hyene. I just wanted to mention that to somebody out there who maybe does that often and feels like they're being encouraging. Please, please be careful because um you're you are most likely hitting someone's very vulnerable place when you're doing that. Yeah. Um, so let's go to Romans 14,

The Kingdom Is Peace And Joy

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17. For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking. What I thought everything was a matter of eating and drinking. Just kidding.

SPEAKER_01 25:50

What is it a matter of then?

SPEAKER_00 25:52

But of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. What again? Wait, it's not um a matter of eating and drinking, and it's not a matter of angst and anxiety and frustration and hopelessness. No, it's a matter of peace and joy and righteousness in the Holy Spirit. Wow. That's where we want to go. That is where we want to go. Food choices matter, but they are not the center of the kingdom. Wait, what? Yes, I'll say it again. Food choices matter, but they're not the center of the kingdom. Jesus is.

SPEAKER_01 26:36

How many of us have lived so many years with food choices and food plans and exercise plans and whatever being the center of our kingdoms?

SPEAKER_00 26:49

Yes, the center of our lives. Just think about how much time we've spent, how much energy, how much thought. A lot of it is thought. Hours and hours a day thinking about it, right? Not even doing anything, but thinking. If our conversations about food consistently produce fear, pride, division, comparison, what about condemnation? We may have lost sight of the greater work that God wants to do, which is, as we just said read in Romans, cultivating righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. I don't want to miss out on that. I don't want to miss out.

SPEAKER_01 27:29

I don't either.

SPEAKER_00 27:29

But I know that I've spent a long time with my mind on the wrong things.

SPEAKER_01 27:36

Verse 19 of the same chapter, Romans 14, says, Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual education, building up. Yeah. Romans 14 doesn't give us a universal menu. It doesn't say this is what y'all should eat and this is what y'all should do with your bodies, but it gives us a way to belong to Jesus and to one another amid our differences, reminding us how we are to respond to each other when God may lead one another differently. I answer to my master, you answer to yours, and together, yes, we pursue righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. I love it. It's so much simpler than we often make it.

SPEAKER_00 28:21

Yes, it is.

Five Intentions For Spirit-Led Eating

SPEAKER_00 28:23

At Revelation Within, we often speak of five intentions for spirit-led eating. So let's switch gears a little bit and head in that direction. We want to reframe them just a bit today. Today, simply hear them as places where we can invite God in. Um, we realize that you might be following a protocol that your doctor has recommended. Whatever your unique situation might be, we want to just urge you to invite God in. That's so, so important.

SPEAKER_01 28:56

And then we also want to encourage you to invite him to show you if given your situation, given what the Lord is leading you to do, if one of these intentions needs to be put on hold, maybe for a season, and there's no judgment from us about that. And y'all don't judge one another about it either.

unknown 29:16

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 29:17

Exactly. Exactly. Okay, so here come the five intentions of spirit-led eating. The first one is I will busy myself as the spirit leads until I prayerfully sense a physical hunger signal.

SPEAKER_01 29:33

The first intention to wait for physical hunger may not be something that you can do at this time. Maybe it would go contrary to what your doctor is telling you. Maybe he's told you he or she has told you that you need to eat every so many hours or something. I don't know. But no one else can tell you what God's plan for you is. So ask him, invite him in, and invite him into what you're being told to do by your medical team.

SPEAKER_00 30:02

Okay, so intentions two, three, and four are likely to be good ideas for anyone on any protocol. We definitely want you to give these a try, no matter what your situation is. So, number two, I will invite the Spirit of God into my meal with a heart of gratitude and praise. No harm there, right?

SPEAKER_01 30:28

No, not at all.

SPEAKER_00 30:29

That that one is 100%. Let's go.

SPEAKER_01 30:33

Number three is I will choose food in a just right-sized portion that delights my taste buds and helps my body feel energized and strong. And I have to say this: intention three is really about discernment, enjoying the taste of the food you eat, selecting the foods that help your body to feel energized and strong. It's likely a good idea for anyone. Talk to your doctor about it if he doesn't want he or she doesn't want you to do that.

SPEAKER_00 31:00

Right. Both Heidi and I have discerned that we feel best when certain foods are not part of our meals. And it might be just a season, right? This might not be forever. But there are times when we just have to change things up a little bit to feel better. God is a part of that, and we respond to what he shows us. You can do that too and still experience peace in your eating. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 31:25

Uh, definitely. Okay, so number four, I will create a peaceful eating experience by being present with the food and reducing distractions. That too could be a good way to approach every meal time for almost anybody. I can't imagine somebody that it wouldn't be.

SPEAKER_00 31:43

I exactly. And number five, I will stop eating before my stomach is full at the peaceful place of just enough.

SPEAKER_01 31:53

Yeah. And it isn't likely that your doctor or your plan would say, be sure you eat to that place of being uncomfortable where you want to blow up.

SPEAKER_00 32:03

Nope, that's not likely. So these are intentions, they're definitely not instruments of judgment. We don't want to use them that way. They give us a language for listening. The spirit may draw our attention to one of them gently and specifically. We don't have to tackle all five at once. We can take it slow.

SPEAKER_01 32:26

That's true.

Download Link And Closing

SPEAKER_01 32:27

And if you want to have a printout of this, these five intentions, you can go to team life is good.com forward slash intentions. TeamLife is good.com forward slash intentions.

SPEAKER_00 32:43

We are so glad that you've been here today. We would love to invite you to join us for our next podcast here at Revelation Within.

SPEAKER_01 32:59

See you next time. Next time.